Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

Page 1

Rocksteady "Yo, Koya and Bludgeon, the way youse two are always talkin' 'bout eatin' yer kills, I hope yer real hungry right now."

Rocksteady " 'Cause soup's on!"

Donatello (Metalhead) "Can it jerk!"


Rocksteady "Gyahh!"

Donnie "I've got a newsflash for you idiots--"

Donnie "--We didn't come here to lose!"


Page 2

Donnie "Guys, I can only keep the bozo barbecue cooking for so long."

Leonardo "Hold up! No more rushing in half-cocked. We're never gonna beat these guys by brawling."

Raphael "But—"

Splinter "Listen to your brother, Raphael..."

Splinter "...You must not let your opponents dictate the flow of the battle."

Splinter "They rely on brute strength and chaos. If you are to defeat them, you must counter with speed and skill, intelligence and bearing."

Splinter "Control yourselves and you control the fight."

Leo "Father's right. I hate those psychos as much as anyone, but we can't make this personal right now or we're no good to each other."

Leo "Times to do this like a team."

Donnie "And no time like the present..."

Donnie "...'Cause I'm running outta gas."

Shredder "Why do you dawdle, fools?!"

Page 3

Shredder "Destroy them!"

Bludgeon "You heard the master!"

Koya "Skree"

Leo "Okay, here they come. We can do this, guys."

Leo "We have to..."

"...For Father."

Raph, Leo, Donnie & Mikey "For Father!"

Page 4 & 5

Rocksteady "Hnh?"

Mikey "Hupp!"


Bebop "Dahh!"


Raph "Too easy, Mike... Too easy."

Leo "Nothing's easy today."

Leo "We've got them confused—now let's scatter and keep them off balance."

Donnie "Off balance?"

Donnie "Great idea!"


Rocksteady "You all right, B?"

Bebop "Stupid lasers."


Bebop "Gah!"

Raph "Yo, fish breath. Candy-gram."

Bludgeon "Wha—"


Mikey "Heh. Candy-gram."

Mikey "Good one, Raph."

Koya "Skree"


Koya "Gah!"

Koya "Pathetic tricks won't keep you—"

Koya "—Hidden?"

Shredder "Imbeciles!"

Page 6

Shredder "They have stolen your advantage!"

Shredder "You are losing control!"

Splinter "Control yourself..."

Mikey "Dude, what's Father doin'?"

Raph "You ask me..."

"...Looks like he's gettin' ready for his turn."

Splinter "...Control the fight."

Raph "Let's finish this..."

"...So Father won't have to fight by himself."

"Take heart, Yoshi—your precious sons are with you..."

Page 7

Oroku Saki (flashback) "...You will not die alone this day."

Hamato Yoshi (fb) "No, Saki! They are..."

Yoshi (fb) "...Innocent."

Saki (fb) "Are they?"

Saki (fb) "I think not."

Saki (fb) "No, I see four soldiers, guilty of knowingly collaborating with a sworn enemy of the Foot Clan."

Saki (fb) "Guilty of collaborating with you, Hamato Yoshi."

Yoshi (fb) "But... They are only boys."

Saki (fb) "As were we when we first took up our katana. Yet, youthful as we were, we knew any guilty that belong to our master belonged to us as well."

Saki (fb) "Why should it be any different for these four? You chose to betray the Foot and they, in turn, chose to follow you. And now all will pay the just price for those decisions."

Saki (fb) "I will never allow defiance of my rule go unpunished."

"And so look there, Hamato Yoshi—"

Page 8

"—Look to the sons you have dragged into your betrayal."

Raph "C'mon, Mikey!"

Mikey "We should probably bring flowers for the date, dude."

Raph "Way ahead of you, little bro."



Rocksteady "Yow! Wasps!"

Bebop "Those ain't wasps, Roc—"


Bebop "Ow! Ow!"

Rocksteady "Ow. Ow."

Mikey "Man, look at those dorks."

Mikey "We should just let 'em beat each other up."

Raph "You know, Mike..."

Page 9

"...I think you're onto somethin'."

Zayton Honeycutt "Okay--I've got the final flow-tube attached."

Honeycutt "We're ready for the ooze instillation."

Leatherhead "I think you'll find this less of an instillation, Professor..."


Leatherhead "...And more of a deluge."

Harold Lillja >But a healing deluge, right?<

Leatherhead "I suppose we'll soon find out."

Leatherhead "Speaking from much personal experience..."

Leatherhead "...An unknown outcome won't stop you science types from conducting your little experiment, will it?"

Honeycutt "No--not this time, it won't."

Honeycutt "With all that's at stake..."


Honeycutt "...It can't."

Page 10

"You waste your time..."

Saki (fb) "...Praying for the things you desire when, in truth, only action will suffice."

Yoshi (fb) "There are those who would say meditation and praying are, at times, the only actions sufficient for one's cause, Saki."

Saki (fb) "For priests and the powerless, perhaps. But we are warriors, Yoshi. Ninja."

Saki (fb) "Our destinies are forged on the battlefield—not traipsing mindlessly through the astral domain."

Yoshi (fb) "Mindlessly?"

Yoshi (fb) "It's not often I hear such palpable irony from your lips, brother."

Saki (fb) "Feh! Call it what you will. It makes me no less right."

Yoshi (fb) "I think Masters Maji and Masato would disagree."

Saki (fb) "They might..."

Saki (fb) "...Were they still alive."

Saki (fb) "But they are not, and no amount of meditating will change that fact."

Yoshi (fb) "No. But we can still honor their memory."

Yoshi (fb) "Tell me, Saki..."

Yoshi (fb) "...How much longer do you intend to wreak mindless destruction in the name of the Foot Clan?"

Saki (fb) "How long? Until order is established—absolute order under the Foot."

Saki (fb) "And you of all people should know, Yoshi, order only comes..."

Page 11

"...From chaos."

Mikey "This is crazy, dude!"

Mikey "Totally crazy."

Raph "Yeah—but maybe just crazy enough to work."

Raph "C'mon, you big dummies..."

Raph "...What're you waitin' for?"

Mikey "Yeah, we're right here. Standin' still."

Mikey "Like two insane people."

Rocksteady "Grah!"

Bebop "Kill 'em!"

Raph "Now, Mike!"

Page 12

Koya "Where did you go, little worm?"

Koya "You know what birds do to worms, yes?"

Leo "Yeah, yeah—you eat them."

Leo "Careful you don't choke!"


Koya "Skaww!"


"Looks like birdbrain's in some serious trouble..."

Page 13

Donnie "...Are you gonna just let your friend go down like that without lifting a fin to help?"

Koya "No! My wings!"

Bludgeon "Koya?"


Bludgeon "Ahhh!"

Bludgeon "Grarr!"

Donnie "Oh, that injury looks bad."

Donnie "We better put a light on it."

Bludgeon "Yahh!"

Bludgeon "I can't see!"

"Dude, I think Donnie and Leo are winnin'."

Page 14


Mikey "But are we?"


Raph "Pretty much, yeah."


Raph "We got these guys knockin' the stuffin' outta each other, don't we?"

Bebop "Quit hittin' me, pal!"

Rocksteady "I ain't tryin' to! 'Sides, you hit me!"

Mikey "Yeah, but they got a lot of stuffin'. We totally dropped a whole buildin' on 'em once, remember?"

Raph "Nyah! Nyah!"

Raph "Come and get us, Tweedle-Dweeb and Tweedle-Duh!"

Bebop "Get 'em!"

Rocksteady "Dis is all their fault!"

Raph "Lucky for us, most of that stuffin' is between their ears."

"Your friends fight intelligently..."

Page 15

Kitsune (telepathy) "...They find strength in their opponents' weaknesses."

Kitsune (t) "Cunning."

Kitsune (t) "Like foxes."

Kitsune (t) "But we are the only true foxes here, child. You must remember that after this ritual has been completed."

Kitsune (t) "Yes, the victors will be the strongest and the most cunning. But the spoils of their victory?"

Kitsune (t) "Those will go to those most sly."

Nobody "Alopex? Alopex!"

Alopex "Wha... What?"

Nobody "You okay? You looked like a zombie or somethin'."

Alopex "Yeah, I... Guess I just spaced out for a moment."

Nobody "Snap outta it. You're missin' the whole fight."

Alopex "How are the turtles doing? Are they winning?"

Nobody "Well, they ain't losin'."

Alopex "Oh... That's good to hear."

"I can't see you!"

Page 16

Bludgeon "Koya! Where are you?! I'm... I'm blind!"

Koya "Here, Bludgeon!"

Koya "Help me! Please!"

Bludgeon "Koya?!"


Leo "Uff!"

Bludgeon "Get away from her! Can't you hear? She's done!"

Leo "Yeah. I think you're right."

Bludgeon "Your wings! What... What happened, Koya?"

Koya "The traitor—Leonardo. Broke my wing and stole my feathers. Just as the robot stole your eyes."

Bludgeon "When I heard you scream, I... I lost focus on the fight and—"

Koya "Stop. It doesn't matter. We have both failed."

Koya "This fight doesn't belong to us anymore."

"Okay, this is gettin' embarrassin'!"

Page 17


Rocksteady "Uff!"

Raph "The more we get these idiots to wallop each other..."

"...The more they keep gettin' up."

Bebop "You did it again, dummy!"

Rocksteady "Who you callin' dummy, dummy?!"

Mikey "And the more pooped we get, phew!"

Leo "Maybe it's time for a new plan."

Mikey "Leo! Robo-bro! Thank God!"

Raph "What happened to the bird and the fish?"

Leo "Grounded."

Donnie "Seeing things in a new light."

Raph "Whatever. We still got the nimrod twins to deal with."

Mikey "We made 'em beat each other up... But I think they like it."

Page 18

Leo "Time to start beating them up ourselves, then. Raph's not the only one itching for some serious payback."

Donnie "Wait. Hold that thought, Leo."

Donnie "Yes, I'm listening."

Donnie "Now? You're sure?"

Donnie "..."

Donnie "You don't sound sure."

Raph "Who's he talkin' to?"

Leo "Got me."

Mikey "Whoever it is..."

"...He needs to make it real quick."

Bebop "Sorry 'bout conkin' you on the head before, Rock."

Bebop "And callin' you a dummy."

Rocksteady "Not half as sorry as those green losers are 'bout to be, B."

Donnie "Okay... If you think so. How much time?"

Raph "C'mon, c'mon, Donnie..."

Donnie "Okay. Should be enough."

Donnie "Good luck."

Page 19

Donnie "Put your weapons down, guys, and stand back."

Mikey "Donnie, what are y—"

Donnie "No time for explanations, Mikey."

Donnie "Let's just say, I learned the hard way that conventional fighting won't stop Bebop and Rocksteady."

Rocksteady "Hey, what's this tin can doin'?"

Bebop "Committin' suicide."

Donnie "No--that's gonna take something a bit more drastic."

Donnie "Bye, fellas. It's been a blast."


Page 20


Raph "Donnie!"

Shredder "What is this?"

Splinter "Donatello?"

Alopex "Oh... No."

Page 21

Bebop "Stupid robot."

Bebop "Thought he could... {Koff}... Blow us up."

Rocksteady "Yeah... {Koff} Now his stupid brothers are gonna need a {koff} veteran to fix 'em up when we're done with 'em."


Donatello (turtle) "It's veterinarian..."


Donnie "...Stupid."

Leo "No..."

Mikey "...Freakin'..."

Raph "Way..."

Donnie "Man..."

Donnie "...That felt good."

Page 22

Raph "Donnie!"

Leo "Welcome back, bro."


Mikey "Whoa! Kettle drum!"

Donnie "Heh, yeah—new and improved, just like my bo-staff. All courtesy of Fugitoid."

Splinter "And yet the same heroic warrior you have always been."

Donnie "Father!"

Splinter "Yes, my son. And very proud to be so."

Splinter "You will soon have to share how Professor Honeycutt was able to bring you back to us in such a fashion, my son."

Splinter "But first..."

Splinter "...I know you are weary from the first battle, but I must ask that you find the strength within yourselves to carry on without me for a short time longer."

Mikey "Without you?"

Splinter "Yes, Michelangelo. Before Donatello surprised us with his return, I was seeking answers on the astral plane—searching for clues from the past to help me defeat Saki."

Splinter "I have yet to find them."

Page 23

Leo "Okay, this is it. We've trained for this. We've bled for this. We've nearly died for this."

Leo "And now we will finish this. And if we can't, then we do what we can to buy Sensei the time he needs. Together."

Nobody "What can we do, Master Splinter?"

Splinter "Pray, child."

Splinter "Pray with all your heart and soul."

Shredder "Are you quite finished, Yoshi?"

Shredder "I grow tired of this delay."

Splinter "You are right, Saki—this sacred rite is only half complte, and the first victory belongs to Clan Hamato."

Splinter "Be that as it may, it is your right, as the challenged, to choose where we fight the final battle in this ritual."

Shredder "I choose the rooftop."

Shredder "Since you enjoy spending so much precious time in your head wandering through the cosmos..."

Page 24 & 25

"...Why not let the heavens be witness to your doom?"

Shredder "Come then, sons of Hamato Yoshi."

Shredder "Know your better."

Page 26 & 27


Shredder "Rrgg!"


Raph "Know this, jerk!"


Shredder "Cretins!"


Leo "Uhh!"


Shredder "Whff!"

Donnie "Hey, Shredder—remember me?"

Shredder "Hm. The duplicitous Donatello."

Mikey "Don't know what duplicitous means..."


Mikey "...But you've been duped, Oroku Sucky!"

Shredder "Duped? Indeed."

Shredder "Something you mutants should well understand."

Shredder "Led like cattle to the abattoir."

Shredder "Guilelessly following your father to his doom."

Shredder "The filthy rodent who sleeps through your slaughter."

Shredder "Shall we continue?"

Page 28

Leo "Yes! Let's!"

Shredder "Ah, the failed chunin."

Shredder "The first to attack."


Leo "Grff!"


Leo "The first to fall."

Leo "Fall? We're just getting started, Shredder."

Shredder "I promise you—so am I."

Donnie "Promise?!"


Donnie "I made a promise, too!"

Page 29

Donnie "A promise to never forget how badly you hurt me when you sent your goons after me!"

Donnie "A promise to never let you hurt anyone else like that again."

Shredder "You waste your breath with all this talk of promises. You may have new power."

Shredder "But..."

Shredder "I."

Shredder "Am."

Shredder "Power!"

Donnie "Hrrk!"

Shredder "Pitiful."

Raph "You're lookin' pretty damn smug, Shredhead."

Raph "Time to wipe it of your ugly face."

"Control your anger!"

Page 30

Masato (fb) "You will never know true victory that way!"

Masato (fb) "Your fury has cost you your balance, boy!"

Saki (fb) "Ha! I've got you now, Yoshi!"

Saki (fb) "Huh?!"

Masato (fb) "And you, Saki! Always too eager to strike your opponents when they appear defenseless!"

Masato (fb) "Ah, look at you both—nearly drowning in your shame and carelessness."

Masato (fb) "One who would let anger rule his actions, another who is driven by an insatiable need for dominance."

Masato (fb) "Do you not see—if you do not learn where these compulsions come from, and how to use them instead of allowing them to use you..."

"...Then you are doomed always to fall."

Shredder "Stay down, fool!"

Page 31

Shredder "You possess the same burning spirit your father once owned—before he surrendered to weakness and compassion."

Shredder "A spirit I will welcome into the Foot once he is gone."

Raph "Yeah?"

Raph "Over my dead body."

Splinter "So be it."

Raph "Hnh!"



Shredder "But understand, my offer was sincere."



Raph "Raagh!"

Shredder "You will regret so foolishly tossing it away."

Raph "Dammit!"

Leo "Got you, bro!"

Page 32


Shredder "Unf!"

Mikey "No more!"

Mikey "I'm so sick of you! Always hurtin' people!"

Shredder "Hiyah!"


Mikey "Always hurtin' my family!"

Shredder "Impressive. I did not expect such fire from you."

Mikey "I'm not tryin' to impress you, Shredder."

Mikey "I'm tryin' to stop you!"

Mikey "Gyaah!"

Shredder "A pity this new anger leaves you unbalanced..."

Page 33



Saki (fb) "Not so big now, eh?"

Yoshi (fb) "What are you doing?!"

Yoshi (fb) "Stop!"

Saki (fb) "Unff!"

Yoshi (fb) "Don't you see he's done, Saki?!"

Saki (fb) "Hm. I see it now. The weakling."

Yoshi (fb) "Why would you attack him like that?"

Saki (fb) "Because he tells everyone he is the strongest and the toughest. I wanted to show he was wrong."

Yoshi (fb) "But he's never threatened you directly!"

Saki (fb) "Does it matter?"

Yoshi (fb) "Yes, Saki, it does. Master Masato says we are only to fight if we have to."

Saki (fb) "Precisely. I did what I had to."

Saki (fb) "So, are you going to let that hot anger of yours out now, Yoshi? Should I put you in your proper place, too, eh?"

Yoshi (fb) "No, Saki—not this time. Just remember, you might be the strongest and toughest..."

Page 34

"...But you don't frighten me."

Shredder "Ah, Yoshi. Awake from your daydreams, I see."

Splinter "Yes, you could say I have awakened."

Splinter "While you battled my brave sons, I meditated on our history together, Saki, looking for any frailties you may have—weaknesses I could exploit in the battle to come."

Splinter "At first all I saw, as I traveled step-by-step through out shared past, was your innate and undeniable power."

"But then I recalled something Master Masato told us when we were boys—about how our most primal impulses can be either boon or bane."

"It was, he said, all a matter of understanding why we possessed them... And, then, how best to channel them."

"For me, it was an unpredictable rage that festered inside, always ready to erupt and unleash wrath against those I felt had caused me pain."

"But I learned over time my fury was simply misguided self-protection and allowing it to flow unabated caused more harm to myself than any of my enemies."

"It wasn't until I learned to control it, as Master Masato had encouraged many times, that I finally knew true peace..."

Splinter "...And true strength."

Page 35

Shredder "Strength?"

Shredder "Whatever strength you possessed vanished the moment you extinguished the rage-fire burning inside of you, rat."

Splinter "You misunderstand, Saki."

Splinter "I never said I put out the fire."

Splinter "I said I know how to control it now. When to subdue it..."


Splinter "...And when to unleash it."



Splinter "I learned something else today, too."


Shredder "How to die?"

Splinter "No."

Page 36

Splinter "In two lifetimes, you have sought to destroy me!"

Splinter "My family!"


Splinter "To crush all that is important to me—all that I love! All out of vengeance!"

Shredder "Grf!"

Splinter "All to prove none dare defy y—!"


Splinter "Nnh!"

Shredder "There are two paths, Yoshi—one for the meek, one for the powerful."

Shredder "We must all choose which to follow. Unlike you, I chose greatness."

Splinter "You are wrong—there are many paths to choose from. As for me..."

Splinter "I chose duty!"

Splinter "I chos—grk!"

Shredder "You chose pain, fool."

Page 37

Shredder "Suffering."


Splinter "Gyahh!"

Shredder "And death!"


Splinter "Death awaits us all. In that... We have no choice."

Splinter "And yet, you speak of it as a fate belonging solely to others."

Splinter "It is true—you are very powerful, Saki. But I understand now it is a power that chose you, and not you it."

Splinter "A power that deludes you into believing you cannot be defeated. Cannot be destroyed."

Splinter "But you are wrong."

Splinter "Yes, death can be escaped—we both know this—but only for a time."

Splinter "You chide me for my "mindless" pursuit of knowledge in the astral plane, never realizing it has in fact made me very mindful of death's dominion over all things."

Splinter "Unlike you, death is a thing I have come to respect and, I am unashamed to admit—for the safety of my children—to fear."

Splinter "But in your blind confidence, you have forgotten, Oroku Saki..."

Page 38

Splinter "I have never feared you!"

Shredder "But... How..."

Shredder "Hrnng... Ghh... Hrnn..."

Splinter "It is time to take the power back, Saki."

Splinter "Time to control that which has controlled you for so long."

Page 39

Splinter "Time to be strong."

Shredder "We... We were friends, Yoshi. Brothers."

Shredder "And then you... You turned your back on me. Why?"

Splinter "I did not intend to turn my back to you, Saki—only to what you had become."

Splinter "But perhaps in my rash anger, I accomplished both."

Splinter "For that, I am truly sorry."

Shredder "This... This is not how... It was supposed to end."

Splinter "It never is, my friend. Do you remember the forest we once played in as small boys? The dreams we shared?"

Shredder "Yes. Dreams of warrior glory. Of... Of shared honor."

Splinter "I have never given up on those dreams. Even in the darkest hours."

Splinter "And so... The power is now in your control, Oroku Saki. Which path do you choose in these, your dying moments?"

Shredder "I... Hrff... Choose the dream, Yoshi."

Shredder "I choose a warrior's honor."

Splinter "Then it is my honor to help you know the dream once again."

Page 40

Shredder "Granddaughter, hear me now. You are my finest soldier."

Shredder "If I have ever been harsh on you, it was from pride..."

Shredder "...Pride in your indomitable strength and loyalty."

Oroku Karai "Hai, Master."

Shredder "<Kitsune... I have failed—but I do not accept failure.>"

Shredder "<If what Yoshi says is true—if there are many paths...>"

Shredder "<...I will find the one that leads back to you.>"

Shredder "<And I will be waiting, my Dragon Warrior.>"

Shredder "And you, Hamato Yoshi..."

Page 41

Shredder "Hrrgg!"

Shredder "I will see you in the forest again... Brother."

Splinter "I do not doubt it."

Splinter "My brother."

Page 42

Splinter "Your sword, my son."

Leo "Thank you... Father."

Mikey "Oh... God."

Mikey "This isn't real."

Splinter "How is your leg, Raphael?"

Raph "No biggie, Sensei. I'll live."

Donnie "What aboutyour shoulder, Father?"

Splinter "I, too, will live, Donatello."

Karai "Hamato Yoshi!"

Leo "Back off, Karai—we're done here."

Karai "I only wish to speak to your father, Leonardo."

Splinter "Please. Speak, Oroku Karai."

Splinter "I am listening."

Page 43

Karai "The jonin of the Foot Clan is dead."

Karai "As chunin, it is my duty to rise up and become master. My duty to rule."

Splinter "And would you continue your grandfather's vendetta against us, child?"

Splinter "Or would you honor the righteous outcome of these ancient rites?"

Karai "I would do that and more, Hamato Yoshi. The Foot Clan is my family—my life—and I want only what is best for it."

Karai "Today, I have witnessed true honor—true leadership."

Karai "And I understand now that I must look to the past if I am ever to attain those same attributes. To where it all began."

Karai "To Japan."

Karai "Therefore, I humbly offer my grandfather's throne—and my sword—to you..."

Karai "...Master Splinter."

Splinter "And I humbly accept your offering to lead the Foot Clan, Oroku Karai."

Splinter "Just as I accept..."

Splinter "...Your sword."

Mikey "No."

Page 44

Mikey "I'm done."

Mikey "I... Can't be a part of this."

Mikey "Not anymore. Not if this is what all the fightin' turns us into."

Leo "Wait, Mikey, it's not—"

Mikey "Don't touch me."

Splinter "Do not stop him, Leonardo."

Splinter "His confusion is understandable. This new path is unexpected for all of us."

Splinter "We must give your brother the space he needs to understand it for himself... In his own way."

Karai "With your permission, Master, I would depart immediately as well, accompanied by a select few."

Splinter "Of course, Oroku Karai—you may take any soldiers you believe will benefit from such a journey."

Splinter "Kitsune, however, will remain here..."

"...Under my watchful eye."

Leo "So what's next, Father? We do we do now?"

Page 45

Splinter "Now, Leonardo?"

"I told you, Saki!"

Yoshi (fb) "I told you the forest was fun!"

Saki (fb) "You're right, Yoshi! It's like a dream!"

Yoshi (fb) "And this practice will really help us, too, when we start training with Master Masato!"

Saki (fb) "Then we'll be able to be together a lot!"

Yoshi (fb) "Like brothers!"

Saki (fb) "And we'll become great warriors!"

Yoshi (fb) "And maybe if we train hard enough..."

"...We can both become great masters someday!"

Splinter "Now..."

Page 46 & 47

Splinter "...We embrace our destiny."

Page 48


[Feudal Japan.]

Sulfurch (fb) "They are leaving..."

Sulfurch (fb) "...What are your orders, sir?"

Krang (fb) "Hm. Four children and one old man, and yet they were worthy of Saki's personal attention? There was something... Odd about this execution—that much is certain."

Krang (fb) "Send Chief Science Advisor Ma'riell and her team down to collect DNA and QNA specimens from the bodies, Lieutenant Sulfurch."

Krang (fb) "Maybe it's something I can use to my advantage against these sword-swinging barbarians someday."

Sulfurch (fb) "As you wish..."

Sulfurch (fb) "...General Krang."

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