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 YOU'RE NOT ON 
 NICKTOONS 
 ANYMORE! 

Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

Page 1

SATISFACTORY CONNECTION ENGAGED

Donatello (Metalhead) "Okay, the cables are good to go."

Donnie "Remember--we want them firmly connected at all times. Probably should check them throughout each day."

Donnie "I'm synched remotely to the machine itself, so I'll monitor the data feed at all times but it never hurts to have other eyes checking it out once in awhile."

Donnie "The antibiotic drip's working fine, too. Just make sure you flush any air bubbles from the tubing whenever you swap the bags out."

Donnie "Let's try to avoid an embolism, okay?"

Donnie "And we've got to keep the catheter area clean to avoid infection."

Donnie "Change the dressing daily and generously swab the insertion area with alcohol pads."

Donnie "And, please... Wash your hands. A lot. Before and after you do any of this stuff."

Donnie "Okay, that's it..."

Page 2

Donnie "...The best I can do for myself for now."

Page 3

Donnie "Harold's gathering up more stabilizing equipment so we can safely transport the bod--I mean, me to the lair soon."

Donnie "We'll just need to be sure to keep things sterile there, too."

Splinter "We will work carefully to follow your excellent instructions, my son."

Michelangelo "Yeah, don't worry, robo-bro—we gotcha covered."

Mikey "We'll even spit-shine our mitts if that's what it takes."

Donnie "No spit, please, Mike. Soap and hot water are fine."

Nobody "You're handlin' all this pretty good, Donnie. I don't think I could... Especially this fast."

Leonardo "Yeah, Don. You sure you're okay?"

Donnie "Honestly, Leo, no... I'm not."

Donnie "No matter how it seems, this... All of this..."

Donnie "...It's just really freaking me out."

Donnie "I'm gonna go check on Harold and the professor."

Mikey "Poor Donnie."

Splinter "Indeed. The turmoil your brother must be experiencing, it's... It's unfathomable. I wish nothing more than to give him comfort."

Splinter "But... How?"

Leo "I don't know, Father. But one thing's for sure..."

Page 4

"...He's definitely not the only one freaking out right now."

Alopex "C'mon, Raph. Things are going to be okay, you'll see."

Raphael "No. We shoulda done more to protect him, Alopex. We screwed up... Big time."

Alopex "What you did was save the world."

Alopex "You couldn't help what happened to Donnie."

Raph "We left him behind. If we woulda stayed, he'd be all right now."

Alopex "No, we'd all be dead. Stopping the Technodrome was the most important thing. Donnie knew the risks and he still made the choice to stay behind so you guys could do it."

Alopex "And bad as things turned out, at least he's still alive."

Raph "He's a robot."

Alopex "Wrong. He's your brother and he needs you."

Leo "He's not the only one."

Leo "Let's go, Raph—we've got work to do."

Raph "Yeah? Like what?"

Leo "Mikey's gonna see if he can find Hob and his crew, and you and I need to check on the Foot and the rest of the usual suspects."

Leo "Father thinks the city's bound to be in flux after everything that's happened and we need to get a bead on things as quick as we cna."

Page 5

Alopex "He's right. It's better to get out in front of whatever changes are coming."

Raph "But Donnie—"

Alopex "—Is in good hands. Harold and Fugitoid will take care of him."

Raph "Yeah... I guess you're right. Sittin' here mopin' sure ain't solvin' nothin'."

Mikey "Now you're talkin', bro. Time to hit the streets."

Alopex "Past time—we're losing the dark. Let's go."

Raph "Um... Thanks, Alopex."

Alopex "What are friends for, right?"

Raph "Yeah."

Nobody " "Friends," huh?"

Alopex "What?"

Nobody "Oh, nothin'... Friend."

Nobody "C'mon, let's get outta here and do a little patrollin' of our own."

Alopex "Where to first?"

Nobody "The Second Time Around store..."

Page 6

"...I wanna find out what Casey's been up to."

Zack Baniel's
OLD TIME
Old No.9 BRAND
QUALITY Tennessee SOUR MASH WHISKEY
[...]AND BOTTLED BY
[...] DISTILLERY
[...]OPRIETOR
TENN, U.S.A.
[...]PROOF)

Casey Jones "What the hell are you doin' here, Dad?!"

Hun "Perfect timin'! I was just talkin' 'bout you, kid."

Casey "Looks like that ain't all you been doin'. Guess some things never change, huh?"

Hun "What? This?"

Hun "Nah, this ain't what yer thinkin', kid."

Hun "Guess I just got a little thirstier than normal, is all. Happens whenever I'm in the mood to celebrate."

Hun "Like tonight."

Casey "Right. What makes tonight different than the other gazillion times you said the same damn thing?"

Hun "The Foot, that's what."

Hun "Saw it with my own eyes, kid..."

Hun "...They're history."

Page 7

Elizabeth O'Neil "Casey, do... Do you know what he's talking about?"

Casey "No—and neither does he. Liquored up and talkin' crazy."

Hun "Wrong!"

Hun "I told you—I was there. That rat and his crew took out Karai's bunch right in the Foot's own stinkin' backyard."

Hun "And the news flash on the street is Shredder got ended by them green freaks you been all chummy with lately, too."

Hun "So you know what that means, don't ya?"

Hun "I don't gotta kill you no more, Case."

Hun "Shredder's dead and the hit's off."

Hun "We can finally be a family again. The Jones boys... Back together!"

John O'Neil "He's insane."

Casey "Nah. He's just sick."

Casey "Sick and weak."

Casey "Get out of here, Dad."

Casey "Just... Just go."

Hun "Wait—didn't ya hear me, kid? I'm my own boss again!"

Casey "No... You ain't. You're holdin' your boss in your hand."

Page 8

Hun "But, I—"

John "I think you should go now, sir. I really do."

Hun "Yeah? You gonna make me, pencil neck?"

Nobody "Well, look at that, wouldya?"

Nobody "Looks like showin' up in the nick of time's becomin' a thing for us, Alopex."

Nobody "Get lost, Arnie."

Alopex "Grrrr..."

Hun "Fine. Whatever. You wanna be an ungrateful little twerp and pick these losers over your own flesh and blood, then that's on you, kid."

Hun "Can't say I didn't try, right?"

Hun "And the name's Hun, girl."

Nobody "Heh. More like Lush, you ask me."

Hun "Grahh!"

Page 9

Casey "I'll clean that up."

John "Let me help you, son."

Casey "Mr. and Mrs. O'Neil... These are my friends. Angel and Alopex."

Casey "Guys, these are April's parents."

Nobody "Hi."

Alopex "It's nice to meet you."

Beth "Oh... My."

Casey "So how long were you here?"

Nobody "Long enough. Old man's givin' a new meanin' to 'roided and ripped, I see. You okay?"

Casey "Yeah—old news. Dude was spewin' all his normal crap, stupid drunk."

Nobody "Well, I don't disagree 'bout the stupid part, but faded as he was, he wasn't lyin' 'bout one thing—the Foot got their butts handed to 'em big time."

Casey "By the turtles?"

Nobody "Mm-hm. Splinter, too."

Casey "Good."

Page 10

Oroku Karai "...Master Shredder is gone... But we are by no means beaten."

Karai "We will rise from the dust and the ashes of this defeat and we will become more formidable than we have ever been."

Karai "But know this—if I am to lead you now... If it is my destiny to take up the mantle my grandfather leaves behind... Then the path we follow moving forward will be different. It will be our path and ours alone."

Karai "We will no longer allow outsiders to enter the sanctity of our ranks."

Karai "The Foot are a family and strangers are not welcome."

Page 11

Karai "We have allowed our honor and our fidelity to be infected by these foreign diseases for far too long."

Karai "We know who they are and we are well aware of the pain they have caused our family."

Karai "Starting this very night, we will hunt them down and we will eradicate them."

Karai "We will use sword, tooth, and nail to cut their cancer from our collective being."

Karai "Our master is dead but our clan lives on!"

FOOT CLAN!

"This is almost too much to take in..."

Page 12

Donnie "...I mean, all this data--it's flowing so rapidly and yet I'm able to keep up."

Donnie "Thing is, I don't understand how that's possible."

Zayton Honeycutt "Yes, I remember a similar surprise when I first transitioned into my machine state."

Honeycutt "It's one of many functions of your new body you will need to adjust to, but not necessarily an unfortunate one."

Honeycutt "For one of your advanced intellect, accelerated comprehension and enhanced data retention may very well be a boon."

Donnie "But that's what I'm saying--I know I'm smart, but I'm not this smart."

Donnie "And if it was only my mind that was transferred into Metalhead, shouldn't I be intellectually at the same level as I was before?"

Donnie "I mean, no pun intended, but only my shell changed, right?"

Honeycutt "One would think so, yes."

Honeycutt "But in our early tests of mind transference on Planet Neutrino, we found that an unexpected synthesis between man and machine takes place during the transfer..."

Honeycutt "...One we could never quite explain."

Page 13

Honeycutt "It's as if the natural brain synapses join with the artificial mechanical processors of the host system, forming a symbiotic bond of sorts, rapidly performing multiple calculative and cognitive functions."

Donnie "Like... Like some kind of strange integrated circuit?"

Honeycutt "Exactly, Donatello. Strange... And often exhilarating."

Donnie "Maybe. But there's other things... Like hunger."

Donnie "I know I don't need to eat--at least not in this body--but my mind is telling me I should be starving right now. And tired. But I'm wide awake."

Donnie "And then there's the pain... I'd swear my back is killing me where that freak smashed me with his hammer."

Harold Lillja "Phantom pains and circadian rhythm."

Donnie "What?"

Harold "What you're feeling. Your back is a phantom pain sensation—happens to a lot of amputees."

Harold "And your hunger and tiredness are just your biological clock ticking at you."

Donnie "Feels more like technology than biology at this point, but I see what you're saying, I guess."

Harold "No guessing about it. And speaking of technology, how's that arm holding up?"

Harold "I didn't exactly have much time to reattach it after your friend zapped your turtle brain into this chassis, let alone beta test it.*"

[See TMNT #45B.C.]

Donnie "Seems to be working fine. You did some good work as always, Harold. Especially under the circumstances."

Harold "Meh. Not like it was too difficult."

Harold "I've had plenty of practice repairing my stuff since I met you."

Honeycutt "Is your friend always so disgruntled?"

Donnie "Nah, don't let Harold fool you, Professor."

Donnie "He puts on a grumpy mask, but underneath it all..."

Page 14

"...He's a really good guy."


Woody Dirkins "Well, I'm super-glad you and your bros are all alive, Mikester, all things considered."

Woody "Bummer about Donnie, but coulda been way worse if you really think about it."

Mikey "Yeah, I know, Woody."

Mikey " 'Sides, the Fugitoid says he's workin' on a way to fix Donnie back to normal."

Mikey "He has all kinds of cool tech on Burnow Island to work with now, too."

Woody "See. That's something."

Woody "But that's not all that's buggin' you, huh, amigo?"

Mikey "No, not really. It's just..."

Mikey "...It's just that we beat Krang. And we're pretty sure Shredder, too, and still the first thing my dad's got us doin' is lookin' for where the next trouble's gonna come from."

Mikey "It's, like, what's the point, dude?"

Mikey "I try to act all tough in front of my family, but just once I wish the fightin' would lead to somethin' good and not just more fightin', you know?"

Woody "I hear ya, bro. But you guys did save the whole world from a gnarly death."

Woody "Far as your ol' buddy Woody's concerned, that's a darn good thing."

Mikey "That is pretty awesome, huh?"

Woody "The Mikester, like a boss!"

Mikey "Thanks, man—I needed that... And this! Now I got some Mutanimals to find."

Woody "No worries, bro. Just remember, tough as you ninja dudes are..."

Page 15

"...It's okay to ask for help from your friends sometimes."

New York Tech Staff Parking

SLAM

Patrick Miller "Cripes, Miller..."

Miller "...What have you gotten yourself into?"

"Demons?"

Page 16

[Earlier.]

April O'Neil (flashback) "That's hard to believe, Professor."

Miller (fb) "Harder to believe than mutant humanoid turtles and ancient ninja lords returning from the dead?"

April (fb) "Um, yeah. Point taken."

Miller (fb) "As I was saying, Miss O'Neil, it's all right here in the scroll."

Miller (fb) "According to this, thousands of years ago, a small family of incredibly powerful immortals ruled the Earth."

Miller (fb) "A pantheon, if you will."

Miller (fb) "Each sought to impose their will over the others in a seemingly endless game of conquest and intrigue."

Miller (fb) "But then they mysteriously disappeared during a time of great calamity and massive destruction."

April (fb) "Like the biblical flood?"

Miller (fb) "Perhaps. There are stories of a great flood across many religions and cultures throughout history, so whatever the source, all seem to be in agreement it happened."

Page 17

Miller (fb) "It continues that, in time, they inspired myth and legend, and were believed to be gone forever."

Miller (fb) "But they weren't gone. They simply waited."

April (fb) "Waited? For what?"

Miller (fb) "Waited and watched as the chaos of the rapidly multiplying mortal race overtook the world that once belonged to them."

Miller (fb) "All the while anticipating the continuation of their game—a resurrection of the contest between them that would unfold over long centuries."

Miller (fb) "Mortal creatures would be their pawns, affecting the world on the immortals' behalf during the long march towards an endgame..."

Miller (fb) "...With the ultimate prize being uncontested control of the world."

April (fb) "Wow. This is all very... Wow."

Miller (fb) "Yes. And there is an indication in the text that there's a companion piece to it—a book of some kind—that's being held separately in the American Southwest somewhere."

April (fb) "Why in America?"

Miller (fb) "I don't know why—I've only just begun to decipher it and everything about it is mysterious. I found it amongst the Foot's archives and I'm not even certain they know it exists."

Miller (fb) "It seemed to have been hidden away for quite some time when I discovered it and, frankly, I don't know why I took it. It just felt... Significant."

April (fb) "And now I'm going to take it from you."

Miller (fb) "What? Wait! You don't know what to do with that!"

April (fb) "I want Splinter to take a look at this to see if it makes any sense to him... And to figure out if the Foot are involved."

April (fb) "Now, you can try to stop me, but that didn't go so well for you last time, did it, Professor?"

Page 18

April (fb) "Good."

April (fb) "I'll be in touch, Professor. Stay safe!"

Miller " "Stay safe," she says."

Miller "Yeah..."

Miller "...Right."

Foot Assassin "Hello, Professor Miller."

SHLIPP

Miller "Hrrgk!"

Foot Assassin "And good-bye."

"You look surprised, my friend..."

Page 19

TCRI

Baxter Stockman "Did you really think StockGen was the only hand I was playing in the game?"

Shredder "You mistake impatience for surprise, Stockman. My reunion with my clan awaits and I grow weary of these delay tactics. I am beginning to regret granting you my time."

Shredder "Perhaps you are not as prepared to be my partner as you claimed, hm?"

Baxter "Oh, ye of little faith. Why do you think I brought you here before returning you to your kung fu cronies, eh?"

Baxter "The truth is, I maintain a number of offshoot and front companies."

Baxter "This particular one I set up utilizing funds I was secretly tunneling away from the StockGen projects being financed by General Krang."

Shredder "What do the letters represent?"

Baxter "T.C.R.I.?"

Baxter "That would be the Techno Cosmic Research Institute."

Baxter "I thought the name an apropos pun considering who the unwitting benefactor was."

Shredder "I have no interest in puns, Stockman. Nor do I have respect for a business partner who openly admits he is a dishonorable thief."

Baxter "Oh, don't you worry, Shredder—that was the old embezzling Stockman. Not the new hero Stockman, who saved your life even though he could have just as easily left you for dead."

Baxter "No, the new Stockman has a vested interest in being completely frank with you, even about past transgressions."

Baxter "It's just good business."

Baxter "Let's go inside, shall we?"

Baxter "By the way, how do you like the new suit we got you?"

Shredder "I find it... Uncomfortable."

Baxter "Hm. Yes. Not enough razor spikes, I suppose."

Baxter "Never fear—my driver will deliver your armor inside, where you can be as shiny and conspicuous as you please."

Page 20

Baxter "So, as I was telling you earlier in the limo, I think you will be very pleased with what I'm about to show you."

Baxter "You see, when I was a boy, my father was an avid chess player—an obsessive fanatic, really."

Baxter "And he constantly used the game as a teaching tool, always to instill in me the importance of staying as many moves ahead of my opponents as possible."

Baxter "After you."

Baxter "There are many things I disliked about my father, but the lessons I learned at his chess table are ones I took very much to heart."

Baxter "As you are about to see."

CLICK

Baxter "So, what do you think..."

Baxter "...Partner?"

"Well, this has certainly been an eventful evening..."

Page 21

Beth "...But I think I've reached my limit. Time for this ol' gal to get some shut-eye."

John "This ol' guy, too."

Beth "It was very nice to meet you, Angel and Alopex."

Nobody "Same here, Mrs. O'Neil."

Beth "Please... Call me Beth."

John "Good night, all."

Nobody "They're nice people, Jones."

Nobody "You got yourself into somethin' really good here."

Casey "Don't I know it."

Alopex "It's easy to see why April is the way she is."

Casey "Speakin' of April, I need to give her a call to see how things went at her school tonight and see if she knows about Donnie and the others."

Hun "Yo! Losers!"

Casey "What the hell?"

Casey "Seriously?"

Nobody "You know how Mrs. O'Neil said this was an eventuful night?"

Page 22

"Looks like we're just gettin' to the main event."

Hun "Time for the Purple Dragons to remind this street who's really in charge!"

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