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Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

An anthology book with stories by various creators.

Turtle Soup > volume 2 #3
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vol. 2 #3


A Green-Grey Sponge-Suit Sushi Turtles Solo Adventure!: Viceroy in: "Action, Not words!"

by Mark Martin.

Synopsis to be added.

"Bearing the Burden"

by Rick McCollum, Bill Anderson & Jim Woodring.

Raphael practices with his sai, willfully embracing the upcoming challenge. Though many of the Shredder’s goons have fallen before his weapons, they cannot help him in what is to come; he must overcome the challenge alone. Luckily, that’s just the way Raphael likes it.

Leonardo inspects his swords, pensively awaiting what comes next. He understands steel and the skill to use it, having bested high-tech aliens with his simple blades. However, his weapon will be useless in this next encounter and he stoically accepts this reality.

Donatello meditates with his bo staff. In the past, its range has been like a shield to him, deflecting many attacks… even protecting him from dinosaurs. However, his staff won’t be able to save him from what’s about to happen. In fact, no one can save him.

Michelangelo wields his nunchakus, thinking about how his graceful form always ends in brutish results: clobbering his enemies. He would rather avoid hurting others and shirk the responsibility of being a warrior, but he knows he has no choice. He must walk into the impending danger willingly and without protection... though he'd much rather fight Savanti Romero again than deal with what lies ahead.

Down in the sewer lair, the Turtles begrudgingly gather in Splinter’s “clinic”, whining that they don’t want to get their shots. Splinter warns them that shell fungus could prove fatal if they aren’t inoculated. Filling his syringe, he tells them to “bear the burden” and bend over.

"Turtles Attack!"

Part 3 of 4 by Michael Dooney, Mary Kelleher, & Steve Lavigne.

As the robots appear from Henry’s time gauntlet, the Turtles prepare for yet another weird throw-down. With some effort, Don and Mike successfully take out the tank with arms while Leo and Raph obliterate the serpentine robot.

That settled, Raph is ready to pick up where he left off and throttle Henry. Leo calms him down and demands an explanation. Henry tells them about the time gauntlet and shares another piece of bad news: As the gauntlet is meant as an observation device, time has been “frozen” around them (hence why no one in Florence has noticed all the fighting). Even worse, it won’t “unfreeze” until they figure out how to work the gauntlet and send Henry and Betti home.

Don gets to work helping Henry figure out the gauntlet (to seemingly no progress) while Mikey teaches Betti how to twirl some nunchakus. After an hour of this, Betti starts to get bored and bugs Don and Henry. She decides to show them which button she pushed that caused the whole fiasco and accidentally unleashes a trio of samurai warriors. Raphael groans in frustration…

"Sweat, Sweat, Sweet Renet"

by Jim Lawson, Michael Dooney, Mary Kelleher, & Mary Woodring.

It is the age of dinosaurs and the leopard skin bikini-clad Renet is struggling to climb to the top of a steep cliff. Along the way, she is menaced by hissing serpents, vicious pteranodons and a very hungry saber tooth tiger.

Eventually, after much sweat is perspired, Renet reaches the top of the mountain. There, the Turtles are already sitting and waiting for her. Quietly, Leonardo remarks to his brothers, “Do you think we shoulda told her about the shortcut?”

"The Ring of Death"

by Jeffrey Bonivert, Justin Hampton

Prologue: Masked, armed and ready for action, Casey Jones prowls the rooftops. He sees a gang lifting goods from a truck and drops in on them. He fights his way through the punks with ease until a midget in a cape steps out and orders “Big Joe” to deal with the interloper. A humongous sumo wrestled then lifts Casey over his head and piledrives him into unconsciousness. The midget orders Big Joe to take Casey back to their hideout where he’ll be properly dealt with.

Not far away, the Turtles hear the sound of violence and rush to the scene. They’ve missed the gang, but find Casey’s hockey stick and a trail of blood. Concerned, they follow the trail to an old apartment building. They scale the fire escape to the one room that’s lit and peek in.

Inside, the midget is about to execute Casey (who is tied to a chair) by injecting him with a “sushi overdose”. The Turtles smash through the wall and confront the midget. The midget declares himself the leader of a criminal organization called the Ring of Death and sends his punks to attack the Turtles. They make short work of the punks, but then Big Joe shows up. Donatello takes Joe on singlehandedly and lectures the sumo wrestler all the while. Don informs Joe that size is nothing unless you have skill, endurance and courage. With that said, he topples Big Joe.

The leader of the Ring says that he’s fatally embarrassed and allows the Turtles and Casey to leave without any struggle. As the sun rises, the Turtles disappear back to the rooftops, leaving Casey to call the police.

"Crack in a Hard Heart"

A.C. Farley & Richmond Lewis.

In the woods of Northampton, Mikey is irritably stomping around, trying to call Raphael in for dinner. Raphael eventually drops down from the treetops, but he’s in no mood to talk. A quick glimpse at Raph’s face shows Mikey that his brother has been crying and immediately he tries to discern what’s wrong.

Raph is reluctant to share his troubles and pushes Mikey away. Mikey persists and Raph finally concedes. He tells Mikey that he got to thinking about their future as a family and that led him to think about what they would do when Master Splinter died. Unfortunately, he couldn’t escape the thought and eventually worked himself up, leading to tears.

Michelangelo places a hand on Raph’s shoulder and tells him that what he’s been thinking about is perfectly natural; that it’s something every one of them has thought about at one time or another and had the same reaction. The only difference is that Raph puts on such a tough guy façade that it’s difficult for him to cope with his emotions or share them with his family. Mikey tells Raph that all they can do is spend as much time together as a family as they can and make many happy memories.

Together, they walk back toward the farmhouse for dinner. Wiping his tears away, Raph thinks to himself that Mikey can be a real doofus.


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