Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.
An anthology book with stories by various creators.
|Turtle Soup > volume 2 #1|
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vol. 2 #1
- Major characters: Donatello, Leonardo, Michaelangelo , Raphael, Splinter, Henry, Betti Clane, Krang, Bart, The Great Turtle
- Cover date: November, 1991
A Green-Grey Sponge-Suit Sushi Turtles Solo Adventure! "Toyoduh in the Naked City"
by Mark Martin.
Synopsis to be added.
"*Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Attack!!! Part 1"
Elsewhere, in a different dimension and in the future, a short, grey alien-like guy named Henry is working in his lab. The doorbell rings and he’s greeted by the lovely Betti Clane. She says she’s been assigned by the Random Dating Council to be his blind date for the evening. This is all news to Henry, but he decides to show her around the lab, anyway. He says that he’s training to become a Temporal Dimensional Analyst and is currently working on building his own time travel gauntlet. Curious, Betti presses a button on the gauntlet and both she and Henry vanish.
They arrive in Florence, right in the midst of the Ninja Turtles. Thinking the Turtles to be monsters, Betti begs Henry to get them back home. Unsure of how to use the gauntlet precisely, Henry presses some buttons and accidentally unleashes a number of dinosaurs.
The Turtles discard their disguises and attack the dinosaurs. Leo tells Henry to send the dinos back, although he isn’t quite sure how…
"The Purpose of Fear"
by J. B. Bonivert.
In the moonlit forests of Northampton, Leonardo and Splinter are out for a walk. Leo asks his sensei what exactly “fear” is and Splinter readily responds.
Splinter tells Leo that fear is barrier that keeps one from acting; a paralyzing agent. It stagnates the mind and the body and is not easy to overcome. Splinter tells Leo that the only antidotes to fear are courage and action. They are the “weapons” needed to confront the “enemy”.
As they return to the farmhouse, Leo believes he understands the lesson and that to overcome his fear of seeing his brothers hurt in battle, he must adjust his attitude and know when to take action. Splinter approves.
"Donatello: The Ring"
In the woods of Northampton, Donatello finds the lonely spot on the edge of a cliff where Splinter had instructed him to meditate and practice in solitude. Don is impressed by the scenic beauty and, in his distraction, stumbles over the cliff. He survives the fall, but chips off a piece of his shell in the tumble. Looking at it glinting in the sunlight, he sees that much like a felled tree, his shell has rings inside it that denote growth.
As Donatello relaxes and contemplates what life might have been like had he remained an ordinary turtle, an unseen presence takes notice of him. The presence recognizes Don as a part of the “ring”; the eternal circle. The presence considers how its people once crawled on their bellies, then rose up but became lost in the process. Soon, they fell and have remained patiently waiting ever since. The presence is glad to have met Don, as it knows that Don and his brothers will help the cycle begin anew.
Meditating, Don opens his eyes and catches a brief glimpse of a giant turtle poking its head out of the treetops. Don races back to the farmhouse to tell his brothers and bring them back to the spot where he had his vision.
"The Name is Lucindra"
n an abandoned building, a street-tough girl named Lucindra (her mother couldn’t decide between “Lucille” and “Sandra”) spars with Raphael, knocking him flat on his shell for the second time. She gently teases Raph while thinking about her own life; how she used to be a waitress in a bad neighborhood, but now she tends bar four nights a week and goes dancing the other three. While she originally found it hard to believe that the guy who called her for a sparring session turned out to be a ninja turtle, she isn’t too fazed. She’s fought ninja before and learned a thing or two from the encounters.
Suddenly, Raph gets his second wind and pops Lucindra on the chin a couple of times. Lucindra retaliates quickly, nailing Raph right back in the jaw with a powerful kick. Lucindra remembers how Raph set up the sparring session because he said he was “rusty” at hand-to-hand. Although she got the better of him, she knows that Raph isn’t really rusty at all.
Raph calls it quits and removes his sparring pads. Lucindra won two out of three falls, making her the victor of the session. She tells Raph that he’s “not bad for a turtle” and says that he can call her at 1-800-LET-SPAR for another session any time. Of course, since he lost the match, he now owes her a pizza.
Flying in the Turtle Blimp, the TMNT finally locate Krang’s secret base and prepare to attack. Spotting them on his security system, Krang fires a harpoon missile which bursts the blimp. The Turtles crash-land in the moat and then infiltrate the base through a sewage pipe.
Krang, thinking the TMNT are finished, returns to his fiendish experiments. He feeds tainted dog food to a Scottish terrier, which mutates into a lumbering dog monster. Krang bellows with joy, believing that he can sell his “retromutagen dog food” on the open market and use it to mutate an army of vicious monsters under his control.
The Turtles finally arrive on the scene and tell Krang the jig is up. Krang sics the dog-mutant on them, but the TMNT take it down with a net. They corner Krang, but he ejects from his bubble-walker with a rocket pack and escapes. Suddenly, a countdown mechanism initiates and the Turtles escape the base just before it self-destructs. Having foiled Krang’s evil scheme, the Turtles celebrate their victory with a catchphrase or two.
…In the real world, the entire adventure is revealed to have been imagined by a small boy named Bart, playing with his TMNT action figures. Bart’s mom comes home and finds the living room a mess (the Turtle Blimp toy submerged in the aquarium and their Scottish terrier bound up in a blanket). Bart’s mom scolds him for playing too messily in the house.
- Lucindra will appear next in TMNT (Vol. 1) #44.
- Fans often identify the dog-mutant as being Rahzar. However, the monster is never named in the comic and the only similarity it shares with Rahzar is being a canine. "TMNT II: The Secret of the ooze" (Rahzar's first appearance) was released in March of 1991, only a few months before this issue was published.