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 YOU'RE NOT ON 
 NICKTOONS 
 ANYMORE! 

Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

Page 1[]

Sally Pride "Yeee-hah!"

Man Ray "You're going to get us pulled over, Sally."

Sally "No way, Ray. I made a few upgrades—including a radar detector."

POSSIBLE

FIRST SIGHTING!

Ray "I thought modern highway police had radar detector-detectors..."

Sally "They do."

Sally "Which is why I also installed a radar detector-detector-detector."

Ray "Be serious."

Sally "I am! You wouldn't believe the things I picked up when I was at Null."


Page 2[]

Ray "When you were a prisoner at Null, you mean."

Sally "Well, yeah. But, I mean, they wanted the ultimate pilot."

Sally "I spent most of my time in flight and driving simulators. It was almost fun..."

Ray "They wanted the ultimate soldier with me."

"And the things I learned..."

"Fun isn't the word for it."

Sally "Want to tell me what we're doing out here?"

Ray "There have been twenty sightings of the so-called "Jersey Devil" in the past month around here."

Ray "People have described a feral beast walking on two legs, like a man."

Ray "That reminds me of a lot of people I know."

Sally "Hell, they could be describing me."

Sally "...'Cept I'm a feral beauty."


Page 3[]

[Nearby.]

Null >I want the subject recaptured immediately, Fist.<

Fist "Then you should have called us in the day it escaped."

Null >And I want it alive. Do you hear me?<

Fist "We're professionals, ma'am."

fssssss

Waster "Yeah..."

GRAAH

Waster "Well-paid professionals."


Page 4[]

Sally "So, say we find him. Her. It. Whatever. What then?"

Ray "We get them to join the Mutanimals."

Sally "Oh, just like that? Come on, Ray. We don't even offer a dental plan."

Ray "We offer communiy. Friendship. A chance to make a difference for all mutants, everywhere."

Ray "And also, we... We need as much help as we can get."

Ray "That business with Slash. That was just the overture. What comes next..."

Sally "We'll get him back, Ray. Count on—"

Ray "Look out!"


Page 5[]

SKREEEEEEEEEEE

Sally "Whoa!"

Dreadmon "Ha!"

GRRRH

Dreadmon "Wait... You're..."

Dreadmon "You're like me."


Page 6[]

Sally "That's right. I'm Sally. This is Ray."

Sally "You must be the Jersey Devil."

Dreadmon "Actually... My name's Dreadmon."

Sally "Great. Dreadmon. Nice to meet you."

Sally "Whattya say you help us push the car out of this ditch?"

Ray "Dreadmon... That's an interesting name."

Dreadmon "Nickname. My father was from Jamaica."

Ray "Ah. I see. But you..."


Page 7[]

"I grew up in the Congo."

"In a little village nobody remembers the name of, since the United Revolutionary Front burned it to the ground."

"I was just lucky they were looking for more soldiers. No matter how young."

"I did many things that I had to learn to live with."

Ray "I know how you feel. I grew up in a cage."

Ray "The first thing I learned was not to try and escape."

Ray "The second was how to fight."


Page 8[]

Ray "Still, you weren't always..."

Dreadmon "Half-jackal? No. That came later, after the war."

Dreadmon "I was living on the streets. No work. Less food."

Dreadmon "So when some mzungu in a lab coat came around offering more money than I could make in a year to be part of a "science experiment"..."

Dreadmon "...Well, what was I going to say?"

Ray "So, if you had the choice, you wouldn't..."

Dreadmon "Hell no, man. Would you?"

Ray "That's the thing. I never had a choice."

Ray "Let's go, Sally. We're done here."

Sally "What do you mean?"

Sally "Did we come all this way so you could talk to him for five minutes on the side of the road?"

Sally "Let's at least get coffee!"


Page 9[]

Ray "I used to think Hob's prejudice against human-born mutants was shortsighted and ridiculous."

Ray "But now I see why he thinks that way."

Sally "You can't mean that! What difference does it make?"

Dreadmon "I volunteered to get stuck with a needle. Not to become..."

Ray "A monster?"

Dreadmon "I wasn't going to say that."

Sally "Just... Enough. There are too few of us to worry about who came from what."

Sally "The only thing that matters is..."

Fist "...The four guys who are gonna get a sweet bonus for bringing in two extra mutants on Null's wanted list."


Page 10[]

Ray "Over my dead body."

Fist "Suits me. Jackal-boy's the only one Null wants alive, anyway."

Ray "Watch out!"

THUK THUK THUK

Sally "Ray!"

Sally "Car's running! Come on!"

Dreadmon "Drive!"


Page 11[]

Waster "Not so fast."

VOOOOM

Waster "Bad time to have rear-wheel drive."

BLAM

Waster "Why you..."

Ray "Sally..."

Ray "Go!"

VROOOOOM


Page 12[]

Sally "We've got to go back!"

Dreadmon "You know what happens if we go back, Sally!"

Sally "You're asking me to leave my best friend in the hands of our worst enemies."

Dreadmon "And you're asking me to risk my life for someone I just met!"

Dreadmon "Someone who thinks I'm some kind of traitor because I was born human!"

Sally "Look, I know what he said. But you've got to understand... The first thing I remember..."

Sally "It's sticking my hand through some cold iron bars..."

Sally "...And finding a warm hand to hold on to."

Sally "I owe Ray my life. He was the only thing that kept me going."

Sally "So I'm going back for him. You want to leave him to those monsters, fine."

Sally "But get the hell out of my car."


Page 13[]

Lynch "Wait a minute. They turned around."

Lynch "We're gonna go through them like paper!"

Fist "And lose our bonus? Forget that. Deadaim!"

Deadaim "Got it."

Waster "No way. No way you make that shot."

Deadaim "Half your share says I do."

Waster "Deal. You're good, but you're not that—"

KA-BLAM


Page 14[]

KREEEEECH

Sally "Hold on!"

Deadaim "You're wrong, Waster. I'm not good."

Deadaim "I'm baaaad."

Fist "Good work."

Fist "Waster. Get them out of there before that rustbucket explodes."

Waster "On it."


Page 15[]

Sally "You did not just call my baby a rustbucket."

BLAM BLAM BLAM

Waster "I'm getting tired of missing you!"

Dreadmon "Sorry."

Dreadmon "But I guess..."

Dreadmon "...You're gonna have to get used to it."


Page 16[]

BRAKA BRAK

Deadaim "Then again..."

Deadaim "...Maybe he won't."

Deadaim "By the way, I can drop you both before either one of you even thinks about moving."

Fist "East, Deadaim. We're not here to kill them. Especially not him."

Deadaim "Copy that, Colonel Fist."

Fist "Wonderful. Now, let's clear this little... Misunderstanding up."

Dreadmon "What misunderstanding?"

Fist "Well, you thought we were hunting you. And to be honest, we were."

Fist "But not to kill you."

Dreadmon "Then why?"

Fist "To recruit you."


Page 17[]

Dreadmon "You're crazy if you think—"

Fist "See, Null has a vision for all this. A saner vision than all this chaos. That vision is order. A new order."

Dreadmon "What kind of order?"

Fist "The best kind."

Fist "One where everyone knows their place."

Fist "Hunter and prey..."

fsss

Fist "Master and servant..."

Fist "Human and mutant."

Dreadmon "How did you?"

Fist "Our mutagen is precisely controlled by our cybernetic enhancements. Wonderful trick for the future elite."

Fist "For the chattel, though..."

Fist "We're looking for something closer to your persuasion."


Page 18[]

Dreadmon "Masters... Slaves... This is all ridiculous. I just want to go home!"

Fist "And home you'll go. Maybe even with skin instead of fur. But first, you gotta come with us."

Dreadmon "I... All right, I'll go."

Fist "Uh-uh. You gotta come with us."

Fist "And you gotta show us you're pack material."

Dreadmon "You... You said Null wanted us all alive."

Fist "Well, like the song says... Two outta three ain't bad."

Fist "I just need to know I can trust you."


Page 19[]

Dreadmon "I made a vow a long time ago never to use one of those again."

Dreadmon "Honor that vow, and I'll go with you."

Fist "Fair enough, kid. I admire your conviction."

Fist "Waster! Tear her apart."

Waster "Heh heh. Hey Lunch, you want a drumstick, or a—"

SKREEEEE-THUNK

Ray "Get in!"

Sally "Ray?"


Page 20[]

Sally "You're all right!"

Ray "My body can produce enough venom to knock out a rhinoceros."

Ray "Processing toxins is second nature."

Sally "And you stole my move, back there."

Ray "Now that I had to come up with on my own."

Dreadmon "Glad you're okay man, but this isn't over."

Ray "No."

"I suppose not."

Waster "Grrr..."

SMASH

Sally "Hang on!"


Page 21[]

Ray "Sally! Take the wheel."

Sally "Got it."

Ray "Take this, you might need it."

Dreadmon "I... All right."

SKREEAK

Ray "Look out!"

BLAM BLAM BLAM

FTANG FTANG

Fist "Nice try."

Fist "Well... Not really."


Page 22[]

Dreadmon "Stop."

Fist "Who are you kidding? We both know you're not going to shoot."

CLICK

Sally "Yeah."

Sally "He doesn't need to."

BLAM

Lynch "Is he..."

Fist "Not even close."

Fist "All right, kitty."

"Till we meet again."


Page 23[]

Ray "I... I was wrong, Dreadmon. You should come with us."

Ray "We need to stick together. No matter how we became what we are."

Sally "They're never going to stop hunting you. If it's not Null, it'll be someone else."

Dreadmon "Let them hunt me. I'll give them a chase, for sure."

Dreadmon "Back home, I was always running. But look at this place! So many possibilities, and this is just a tiny part of the country."

Dreadmon "I want to be here, now. I want to run free!"

Ray "But that's what we're fighting for! So no mutant will ever be caged again!"

Dreadmon "That's the thing, mon. The two of you, you grew up in cages. Sad thing, I know. But the worst thing you could do..."

Dreadmon "...Is trade those cages for another one. Even one you make yourself."


Page 24[]

Dreadmon "In any case, thank you. And goodbye."

Sally "Well, there goes your Jersey Devil..."

Sally "Who's next on the list? Bigfoot? The Loch Ness Monster?"

Ray "You think you can drive this heap all the way to Scotland?"

Sally "Give me three days, and an inflatable raft. I'll make it happen."


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