The Big Blow Out (1987 TV series)/Transcript

[Opening sequence and theme song.]

[Episode opens where it ended in “The Big Break In”. The Turtles are in the Channel 6 new van, with April behind the wheel.]

Leonardo "I have the distinct feeling Shredder and Krang won't be bothering us anymore."

Donatello "Better yet, that's the last we'll see of the Technodrome."

Michelangelo "Yeah, it's ciao for now for those bogus buds."

[The ground starts shaking.]

April O'Neil "What was that?!"

[Ahead of them the ground lifts and crumbles as the Technodrome pushes its way to the surface, destroying a farmhouse and barn in the process.]

Donatello "The Technodrome!"

Michelangelo "Put the pedal to the metal, dudette!"

April "You don't have to ask me twice!"

[On the viewing screen inside the Technodrome, Shredder watches them drive away.]

Shredder "Those wretched reptiles! I'll finish them this time."

Krang "You may take the credit, but it'll be my Technodrome that does it for you."

Shredder "Let's not quibble about details, Krang. The important thing is, the turtles will be no more. Prepare missile launchers!"

Michelangelo "Oh, no! Shredder's bringing out the Gonzo guns!"

Donatello "Head for the hills!"

[Tires screech as April floors it and turns the van.]

Shredder "I'll reduce them to atoms!"

[He fires multiple missiles. They all hit a hill just before the van can pass and the resulting explosion sends boulders into the street. They hit the van, knocking it over. Everyone inside shouts as the van starts rolling.]

Shredder "Ha ha ha ha ha! Drink blazing electric destruction, turtles."

Krang "Enough! You've had your fun. Besides, you're mixing your metaphors."

Shredder "Krang, you're such a wet blanket."

Rocksteady "Ooh, can I have a shot at them, boss?"

Bebop "It ain't nice to kick ‘em when they're down."

Rocksteady "Yuh-huh. That's the best time."

[The Technodrome rolls away. Grunting with the effort, the turtles push the topmost boulder off of a pile of boulders and the group climbs to safety.]

Donatello "You know, I get the distinct feeling Shredder is ticked off at us."

Raphael "Really? Nah."

Donatello "We've got to find out what Krang and Shredder are up to."

Leonardo "This time we'll need all the help we can get. We'll have to go back and get Master Splinter."

April "Then you better help me dig out the news van. It's a long walk back to the city."

[On the highway, cars sit bumper to bumper, horns honking. Three police cars have the road blocked.]

Motorist "Hey, what's going on here? I got to get to my job!"

Traffic Cop "You want to explain it to that thing?"

[The Technodrome is bearing down on the highway.]

Motorist "Ahh!"

[It rolls right over a section of highway fly overs, destroying them completely.]

Motorist "Oh, boy, is that gonna raise our highway taxes!"

[The Technodrome continues on, breaking through a section of electrical power lines. Cut to the turtles’ lair. The turtles and April race inside.]

Leonardo "Master Splinter, we need your help. The Techno—"

Splinter "I know. The Technodrome has surfaced and is rolling over anything in its path."

Donatello "Wow! How did you know that, Master?"

Michelangelo "Did it come to you in a vision?"

Leonardo "Did you have a mystical revelation while meditating?"

Splinter "No. I saw it on the five o’clock news."

[They turn to the television, where Vernon is on-site reporting the events.]

Vernon "The entire nation is in a panic as the huge battle machine known as the Technodrome rolls over everything in its path."

April "Oh, it's Vernon! Wait till I get my hands on him! Stealing my story!"

Donatello "Boy, I hate to say it, but this time he really might conquer the world."

April "Vernon? No way! He just wants to be an anchorman."

Donatello "I was talking about Krang!"

Splinter "The time has come for the final confrontation with our ancient enemy."

Donatello "But, Master, how are we gonna do it? We'll never stop Shredder as long as he's inside the Technodrome. That thing’s humongous!"

Splinter "You forget the way of the Foot Clan, my son. The size of your opponent does not matter. His own evil will be his undoing."

Donatello "That makes sense."

Splinter "Now, let us finish this fight once and for all."

[Back at the Technodrome...]

Shredder "I don't understand. Why are we heading West? There's nothing out here. I want to do some damage! I want to destroy something!"

Rocksteady "Me, too, boss. I want to destroy something!"

[He starts stomping around and steps on Shredder’s foot.]

Shredder "Ow! Ow! You nearly destroyed my foot, you honking hornhead!"

Krang "Stop that blasted squabbling. My plan is to have this entire planet under our control by nightfall. But it will require massive amounts of power, and I know just where to get it."

[The Technodrome rolls through a mountain. Meanwhile, the turtles and Splinter follow its trail in the turtle van.]

Donatello "I don't get it. They're headed West."

Leonardo "Why do you suppose that is?"

Michelangelo "Maybe the dudes want to buy a dude ranch. Ha ha."

Leonardo "Look! There it is!"

Donatello "It's heading for Mount Rushmore."

Raphael "So, that's their plan, huh? They want to put Krang's face up there and scare the country into submission."

Leonardo "We'll have to get ahead of it."

[He steps on the gas and races past the Technodrome, but it turns just as he pulls in front of it.]

Donatello "Look! They aren't going to Mount Rushmore. They're after that!"

Raphael "What is it?"

Donatello "It's the Rushmore Power Antenna. It can draw electricity from anywhere on Earth, without the use of wires."

Leonardo "What do Krang and Shredder want with that much power?"

Raphael "A quarter says it's not to roast marshmallows."

[Workers at the antenna site go screaming from the area as the Technodrome bears down on it. Leonardo drives through a fence but stops when a worker runs towards the van, waving his arms.]

Worker "No, no. Turn back. It's heading this way."

Leonardo "But we've got to get in there."

Worker "Are you crazy? It'll crush this place flat.

[The group all climb out of the van.]

Whaa-? Four giant turtles and one giant rat driving an RV? I guess I'm the one who's crazy."

Donatello "That way-- to the power turbines!"

Michelangelo "So, like, what do we do now?"

Donatello "I have a plan."

Raphael "Oh, yeah? Well, you've got about ten...nine seconds, to pull it off."

[Lifters on the Technodrome engage, raising it high above the ground.]

Michelangelo "Whoa! It's turning into a daddy-longlegs drone."

Donatello "Here it comes!"

Michelangelo "Dudes, I think it's time we make turtle tracks!"

Donatello "Good idea, but where?"

Raphael "Well, I hear the Caribbean is pretty nice this time of year. What a way to go!"

[A hatch in the undercarriage opens directly over them. Drills and blades attached to metal arms deploy and come towards them.]

Raphael "Pretty ironic, huh? For this I broke a dental appointment."

Leonardo "Look out!

[They jump aside. The tools drill and cut into the ground around the antenna.]

They're stealing the power antenna!"

Donatello "That's what they think. Come on!"

[Donatello has put on a full body protective suit and is about to add the helmet. He’s standing next to a giant cable.]

Raphael "Oh, oh, I get it. You'll put on that silly-looking suit and embarrass them away."

Donatello "Wrong. I'm gonna plug this cable into the main generator and give Shredder and Krang the biggest hotfoot in history."

[Metallic hands reach down from the Technodrome and lift the power antenna, taking it inside the giant vehicle. A door near the top of the Technodrome opens and the power antenna is fixed in place there, pointing outwards.]

Krang "Now! Plug in those power cables! Hurry, you klutzes!"

[Bebop and Rocksteady take oversized jumper cables to clip on the power cables sticking out of the bottom of the antenna.]

Rocksteady "Don't you know excellence cannot be rushed?"

[Donatello locates a power socket.]

Donatello "Main power output; just what we need. Stand clear, everyone. I'm gonna zap the Technodrome circuits from here to Helsinki."

[He grabs the live end of the power cord and runs towards the Technodrome. Inside, Krang pulls a lever to activate the antenna.]

Krang "Now, to draw in all the energy of this entire wretched planet!"

Donatello "Little David is about to bring down Goliath.

[He is about to touch the live cable to the Technodrome when the power suddenly goes out.]

Huh? The current's shut off. Boy, what a waste of a heroic line."

Leonardo "What happened?"

Donatello "We're too late. They're already drawing in power, with the energy antenna. With that antenna, they'll suck the Earth completely dry of all energy."

Splinter "It is vital that we stop them, whatever it takes."

[There is a roaring sound and the Technodrome starts to roll away.]

Splinter "Quickly, this way, my students.

[They jump onto a wheel and then onto the Technodrome.]

We must shut down that power antenna."

[They start to climb up the side of the Technodrome.]

Shredder "I don't believe it. Those wretched shellbacks-- they're still alive! And Splinter is with them. I'll destroy him with my bare hands and crush those turtles into pulp! I've waited a long time for this."

Krang "No, Shredder. I need you with me to guide the Technodrome."

Shredder "But I want to destroy the turtles!"

Krang "Not now. We still have a world to conquer. I'll dispense with them from here."

Shredder "Oh! Oh! If I don't get to smash something I'll go crazy!"

Leonardo "Keep climbing, turtles. We're almost there."

Raphael "Now I know how King Kong must have felt."

[A door opens and a missile is aimed at them.]

Donatello "Look out! An eyeball missile!"

Raphael "They wouldn't dare fire at us. They'd blow half the hull off."

[The missile changes directions.]

Leonardo "Right. They're going to blast Mount Rushmore!"

Michelangelo "Why, those unpatriotic cheeseballs!"

Donatello "We've gotta stop 'em."

[The turtles leap onto the missile.]

Leonardo "Quick, get the missile off the launcher!"

Raphael "Ally oops!"

[The missile fires, taking the turtles with it.]

All "Help! Whoa! Ah!"

Donatello "Our weight should throw it off course."

Leonardo "It's working!"

Michelangelo "Cowabunga!"

[They fly right by the giant heads of Mount Rushmore.]

Raphael "Do those guys remind you of someone?"

Michelangelo "We did it! We saved the monument!"

Leonardo "Now we'd better save ourselves."

All "Whoaaa!"

Leonardo "Jump for it!"

All "Whoa! Aah! Oh!"

[They leap off the missile just before it crashes into a mountain.]

Donatello "I don't believe it. We made it!"

[At the Channel 6 news station, Vernon reports on the events, with scenes of the city on a screen behind him.]

Vernon "As the monstrous machine approaches the city, a mysterious force is drawing all electrical energy from the city's power sources. Thousands are fleeing the city."

[April enters the studio.]

Burne Thompson "April, where in blazes have you been?"

April "I've been getting your story."

Vernon "Among the missing is our own second-string reporter April O'Neil."

April "Second-string reporter?"

Vernon "Who is probably cowering in some air raid shelter."

[April grasps his chair and spins him, throwing Vernon to the ground.]

Vernon "Oh--oh!"

April "This is April O'Neil. This humongous sphere is the one that's stealing our electrical energy."

[Everyone starts shouting and running when all the news station’s power goes out.]

Employees "Ohh! Uh-oh! Ah!"

April "Oh, nuts!"

[The turtles are in their van at the power station.]

Leonardo "The Technodrome's headed back toward the city."

Donatello "We've gotta stop it."

Michelangelo "You know, dudes, I have this funny feeling that we're missing something."

Raphael "What, did you lose your keys while we were riding that missile?"

Michelangelo "Oh, no. They're right here."

Raphael "Yeah. I think all this stress is really getting to you."

Leonardo "No, I agree. It feels like something is missing."

Donatello "Hey, we’ve got our weapons, our gear. What could be missing?"

Raphael "Yeah. Remember what Splinter said—"

All "Splinter!"

Leonardo "He's still with the Technodrome!"

Raphael "Michelangelo, burn rubber!"

[The Technodrome enters the city and knocks down buildings. Splinter has found a way inside and is searching the corridors.]

Splinter "I must find a way to shut down that power antenna. I only hope the turtles are all right."

Leonardo "There it is!"

Donatello "It's headed for the World Trade building."

[A giant clamp shoots out of the Technodrome and breaks through walls before clamping onto wiring inside the building.]

Krang "Now to put all this energy to a bad use! Prepare to open the dimensional portal."

[He throws a switch and energy shoots up through an antenna on the roof of the Trade building. The turtles stop the van and get out.]

Raphael "Look!"

Michelangelo "Holy guacamole!"

Donatello "Krang's using the city's tallest skyscraper as a giant energy transmitter. He's created a super-size dimensional portal."

Leonardo "That looks like Dimension X!"

Donatello "And we're headed right for the portal. The Earth is on its way to Dimension X! The Earth is headed for that dimensional portal! The whole planet's on a one-way trip to Dimension X!"

Leonardo "We've gotta stop this."

Raphael "Either that or look for a book titled Dimension X on a dollar a day."

[Military tanks line up in the street behind the Technodrome.]

Army General "Fire!"

[The tanks fire bombs and missiles, but the Technodrome raises it force shields, making it impenetrable.]

Army General "Cease firing. They've got some kind of protective force field. Our shells just bounce off it. Gentlemen, I'm afraid the Earth is doomed."

[The turtle van pulls around a street corner and stops. The turtles climb out.]

Raphael "Donatello, I hope you have some incredibly brilliant last-minute plan to save the universe."

Donatello "Why is it always me?"

Raphael "'Cause you're the brainiac of this outfit."

Donatello "Wait a minute.

[He surveys the tanks.]

Come to think of it, that thing does give me an idea. I know how to get rid of the Technodrome once and for all. Michelangelo, you and Leonardo get into the Technodrome and rescue Master Splinter. Raphael, you and I are going to buy some army surplus."

Raphael "I hope they take amphibian express."

Leonardo "We'll have to get under the Technodrome to get past the force field."

Michelangelo "Hey, dude, no problemo."

[They lift a manhole cover and jump down into the sewers. Inside the Technodrome, Splinter has arrived at a power console. He is reaching for a lever when he’s interrupted.]

Shredder "So, Splinter, you came to shut down the portal, huh? Well, you're too late. It's on automatic. The portal will remain open until we pass through it. Today will see my ultimate triumph. The Earth will be conquered, and you will perish by my own hand! Yee-ah!"

[Shredder attacks. Meanwhile, Leonardo and Michelangelo come up to the surface through another manhole.]

Michelangelo "Are you sure we're under the Technodrome?"

Leonardo "Sure, I'm sure! Come on."

[They start climbing.]

Michelangelo "But how are we gonna find a way inside?"

Leonardo "Hmm. That hatch marked "entrance" might be a good place to start."

[He opens the hatch so that he and Michelangelo can enter. Donatello and Raphael run towards the military tanks.]

Donatello "General, we need your help."

Army General "Who in blazes are you?"

Raphael "Don't you watch TV?"

Donatello "We can stop this menace, but we need one of your weapons."

Army General "Those weapons are for army use only. Besides, you're Turtles. Evacuate the area, and I mean now!"

Raphael "All right, hey, hey, don't get your medals in a bunch."

[They back away and duck behind a tank.]

Donatello "Raphael, we're gonna have to borrow that missile launcher."

Raphael "But you said we'd need army surplus. That's brand-new."

Donatello "Well, it'll be surplus when we're through with it."

[Inside the Technodrome, Michelangelo and Leonardo look for Splinter.]

Michelangelo "Oh, I'm getting calluses from opening all these doors."

Leonardo "We've got to keep searching.

[They enter a store room.]

Bebop! Rocksteady!"

Bebop "It's payback time."

Rocksteady "Yeah. We're getting even for all them times you creamed us."

Michelangelo "Right. I remember the time in that paint factory we got you dudes good."

Bebop "Oh, yeah? What'd you do?"

Michelangelo "We did this."

[He kicks over a stack of metal barrels and they roll over the two mutants.]

Rocksteady "Oh! Hey--ha ha-- I remember that."

Michelangelo "Yeah, and my personal favorite time with you guys was at that amusement park, when I did this. Yah!"

[He throws his grappling hook and it wraps around the two mutants, tying them up.]

Rocksteady "Oh, yeah. It's all coming back to me."

Bebop "Boy, thanks for the memory."

Michelangelo "So long, compadres. Gotta split."

Bebop "Uh, I think on our stroll down memory lane, we stepped in a pothole."

[Shredder throws Splinter to the ground and attacks with his sword. Splinter blocks with his walking stick.]

Shredder "I have enjoyed toying with you, you wretched rodent! But now it's time to finish you. Rahr!"

Splinter "It is you who are finished, Shredder."

[He hits Shredder in the stomach with his stick.]

Shredder "Unh!

[Splinter kicks the sword from Shredder’s hand and it becomes embedded in the wall.]

What?! My sword?!"

[He leaps at Splinter. They tussle and burst through a large air vent, both falling into the air shaft. Shredder hits a pipe.]

Shredder "Yaaahh!"

[Donatello and Raphael run to the missile launcher and climb aboard.]

Donatello "Move it, Raphael!"

Army General "Those turtles are stealing the launcher! Stop ‘em!"

Donatello "Take the canon. I'll drive. We're gonna need an exit."

Raphael "One exit coming up!"

[He fires missiles at the street, creating a hole that they drive into.]

Military "Aah! Oh!"

Army General "Blast it! We lost them."

Soldier "Should we go after them, General?"

Army General "No! I refuse to report that my men are chasing two turtles through a sewer."

Krang "General Traag, is your fleet ready?"

General Traag "We are ready, Lord Krang. The entire armada of starfighters is ready to attack Earth the moment it comes through the portal."

[Shredder and Splinter continue their fight inside the Technodrome’s center shaft.]

Shredder "This game has gone on long enough.

[Splinter kicks him and he slides near the edge of a long drop.]

Aah!

[He stands up.]

Now, rodent, meet your doom! Aah!"

[He kicks Splinter, who falls over the edge of the platform. He grabs onto the platform and hangs on.]

Splinter "Unh!"

Shredder "As the new ruler on Earth, this will be my first royal extermination!"

Michelangelo "How about a royal flush, tin grin?"

[He opens a valve and water shoots out, hitting Shredder and sending him plummeting.]

Shredder "Aaaah!"

Leonardo "We must hurry, Master Splinter."

Splinter "We cannot leave this place too soon for me."

[Shredder lands in a pool at the bottom of the shaft.]

Shredder "Aah! Oh, yuck! Oh, those accursed turtles! I'll make them pay for this, along with the bill for my dry cleaning."

Leonardo "I just hope Donatello's had time to work up his plan."

Splinter "Remember what I said, my students. Shredder's own evil has already doomed him to fail."

Shredder "Give me those controls."

Krang "My, but aren't we getting pushy."

Shredder "The turtles and Splinter are getting away! I must destroy them."

Krang "Don't waste your time. In five more minutes, this planet will be entering Dimension X. My space fleet can blast this entire city to atoms."

Shredder "I must destroy them! They must pay for humiliating me."

Krang "Shredder, you're packing an attitude."

Splinter "We must hurry."

Leonardo "Shredder has spotted us. Run!"

Michelangelo "I'm boogie-ing, bud!"

[Beneath the streets, the commandeered launcher has to stop when it reaches a series of pipes.]

Raphael "Whoa, hold it, Donatello! We can't blast those water pipes. We'll be swept out into the river. Are we under the Technodrome?"

Donatello "No, but we're close."

[Shredder fires lasers at Leonardo, Michelangelo, and Splinter. Leonardo hits the ground and then answers his turtlecom when it beeps.]

Donatello "Hey, guys, any chance you could get the Technodrome to follow you to Times Square?"

[Leonardo jumps up and starts running as the Technodrome bears down on him.]

Leonardo "I'd say there's a fairly good chance!"

Donatello "Okay, Raphael, prepare the bird for flight."

Raphael "Roger, wilco. I love that military lingo."

Splinter "Whatever happens, my students, do not move until I say so."

Shredder "Farewell, accursed enemy."

Master Splinter "Remember, stand your ground."

Shredder "Now!"

Donatello "Now!"

Splinter "Now!"

[Shredder presses a button. Raphael fires a missile. Splinter and the two turtles jump aside. The large missile hits the underside of the Technodrome and lifts it into the air.]

Krang "What's happening?"

Shredder "We're being carried off by a missile!"

Krang "Shredder, what have you done?!"

[The Technodrome flies towards the portal.]

General Traag "It's coming through. Open fire!"

Krang "Stop, you fools. It's us! Hold your fire! Aah!"

[General Traag’s armada fires on the Technodrome. It crashes into a larger mechanical sphere.]

Krang "No Technodrome, no portal, no nothing! And worst of all, we're stuck here in Dimension X!"

Shredder "It could be worse. We might have wound up in Dimension Z."

Krang "Come here."

[He attacks.]

Shredder "Oh! Aah!"

[In the city, a crowd has gathered and everyone is cheering. The turtles and Splinter stand before the crowd, waving at them.]

Raphael "Well, this time I really think we've seen the last of old shred-head."

Donatello "You were right, Master. His evil really was his own undoing."

Splinter "And your virtue enabled you to defeat him."

Leonardo "That's right! And we mustn't be any less vigilant just because he's gone."

Raphael "You said it. We ninjas are always on the job."

Donatello "Of course, even ninjas deserve a reward now and then."

Michelangelo "Righteous notion, dude."

[They enter a pizza parlor.]

Michelangelo "I think I'll have my reward smothered with pepperoni and hot fudge."

[End Credits]