Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

Page 1

Raphael "This is bad, right? Bebop and Rocksteady just traveled through time to who knows where!"

Michelangelo "Well, don't we already know they went back to the dinosaurs? I mean, we did see their bones at the museum."

Renet "That's not how it works, Michelangelo."

Leonardo "How does it work, then, Renet? You said it was odd that Bebop and Rocksteady's bones were in this timeline. Why?"

Renet "Well, it's like this. When you go back in time, even if you just like, stand there doing nothing, you are displacing air, right? So like that universe is now different."

Renet "And if the universe is different, then it will never lead to you traveling back in time in the first place. It's a paradox. So you must be in a totally different universe. Right?"

Mikey "Eh. You lost me."

Donatello "You're saying that when you travel back in time you are creating an off-shoot universe."

Donnie "You will no longer be in the universe you came from."

Donnie "Which means if the Rocksteady and Bebop who we were just fighting went back to the Cretaceous, we wouldn't be finding their bones here in our universe."

Renet "Exactly Donatello. But it's also more complicated than that."

Leo "So... Those bones are from a different Bebop and Rocksteady from a different universe?!"

Renet "A different universe, timeline, dimension."

Renet "Whatever you want to call it."

Renet "I'm trying to use my Scepter to track where they went but it's not working."

Renet "They must have damaged their Scepter when they started using it as a club!"

Leo "Well, even though Bebop and Rocksteady could have travelled to any point in time, I say we go back to the Cretaceous period. It's still our best bet at fixing this mess."

Donnie "But, Renet, something bothers me. If Savanti took your Scepter in the past, traveled to the present and now Bebop and Rocksteady have it, then where is Savanti? Shouldn't he be here on Earth right now?"

Renet "Gosharoonies! You're right! Hold on. Let's see here..."

Raph " "Gosharoonies... Gosha- Roonies." "

Renet "Mondo strange! He should be here but he just isn't."

Raph "Well what are we waiting for? Let's go back to the Cretaceous."

Mikey "Let's do it!"

Leo "Ninja turtles, go!"

Donnie "What?"

Leo "I don't know. Feels like we need a catchphrase for this, or something right?"

Mikey "Dude! This is what I've been saying!"

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1 2 3 4 *

[New York City in the year 2000.]

Mutant Bebop "This beast is running hell bent—"

Human Bebop "Hell bent!"

Mutant Bebop "This power breaks the cement—"

Human Bebop "Cement!"

Mutant Bebop "This fist brings pain and torment—"

Human Bebop "Torment!"

Both Bebops "We will destroy everything!"

Mutant Bebop "We're Bebop and Rocksteady!"

Mutant Bebop "Lean and mean. Hard and deadly."

Mutant Bebop "We're Bebop and Rocksteady!"

Mutant Bebop "No tomorrow for those who ain't ready."


Mutant Bebop "Hellooooo, New York!"

Page 3

Mutant Rocksteady "Man! I forgot how cool this was. I was fresh out of the army, met back up with you, Bebop, and we were unstoppable."

Human Rocksteady "You think this is cool? Look at you! Who knew I'd become a super tough mutant."

Mutant Bebop "Oh, yeah, you know, me and Rocksteady here are maybe the toughest guys around."

Mutant Rocksteady "There's no maybe about it. Being mutants? You guys are going to love it."

Human Bebop "You know, future me, I'm actually a little surprised you're still hanging around with this yo-yo. Don't you think we could do a lot better?"

Human Rocksteady "Great, here he goes again."

Mutant Rocksteady "Oh, yeah yeah. We had that fight. We stopped hanging out for like a year. It was terrible. Remember that, Bebop? I mean, what was that all about, right?"

Mutant Bebop "I'll tell you what it was all about."

Mutant Bebop "It was because I got kicked out of the gang and when I wanted you to quit the gang too, you know, cuz we were pals, you wouldn't."

Mutant Rocksteady "But the boss wanted to keep me for my army experience. I had a good thing going."

Human Bebop "Yeah! That's right! You should quit the gang. I thought I was mad about there not being enough toilet paper, but future me is right!"

Mutant Rocksteady "Aw, okay, but that's all water under the bridge now."

Human Bebop "Not for us it ain't!"

Mutant Bebop "Yeah, not for them it ain't."

Human Rocksteady "Look, Bebop, I didn't know that's—"

Mutant Bebop "Hold it! I got a great idea. Let's get you guys in the Foot Clan!"

Human Bebop "The Foot what?"

Mutant Rocksteady "It's the best gang in the world. I wish we had known about it sooner, and now, we will know about it sooner. Haha!"

Mutant Bebop "Maybe we can even get you guys mutated like us."

Mutant Rocksteady "Yes! And get some food on the way!"

Mutant Rocksteady "Yes! Let's go!"

Page 4

(Mutant) Rocksteady "Beat it, ya runt!"

[The Cretaceous period.]

Rocksteady "Pipsqueak just doesn't get it. This ain't no place for losers! You're out of the gang! Hahaha get it, Bebop? He's the one who's out."

(Mutant) Bebop "So what now, boss?"

[Though Rocksteady and Bebop only went back to the year 2000, they will also eventually end up here, and if those bones are any indication, when I say "end up here" it will really be the end.]

[But let's not get ahead of ourselves.]

Savanti Romero "Silence your miserable yap is what now! Or you'll give us away."

Savanti "Soon I, Savanti Romero, will be free of this exile. I'll not have this chance bungled by you."

Rocksteady "Just point us at what to smash, Savanti boss."

Savanti "Music to my ears. See here in this valley?"

Savanti "I point you at them."

Savanti "These aliens appear to be trans-dimensional species like the Time Masters."

Savanti "Over the last few days they've been fortifying and militarizing this outpost."

Page 5

Savanti "The fates brought you to me, Bebop and Rocksteady."

Savanti "Together, we will destroy them, take their trans-dimensional technology, and get back to the 79th Dimension, the dimension of the Time Masters."

Savanti "Are you ready?"

Bebop "We was born ready."

Savanti "Attack!"


Utrom Soldier "Churk, with this armament we'll be ready for any intelligent warrior lizards this world has to offer."

Churk "I believe Ambassador Quanin will be pleased with—"

Churk "Huh?"

Page 6

Pepperoni "•••!"


Raph "...Well, what about "it's turtle'n time!" "

Mikey "Not bad, not bad. I got one—"

Renet "Guys, get over here, you are gonna fer sure want to see this."

Leo "Is it Rocksteady and Bebop?"

Donnie "Hey! Those are the Utroms we saw last time we were here."

Leo "Yeah. It looks like this isn't long after we left."

Raph "Hold up..."

Page 7

Raph "Pepperoni, are you out there?"

Pepperoni ">Raphael< ♥"

Pepperoni "•••••••• •• ^^^ ^^"

Pepperoni "••••• ••••• ••"

Raph "Pepperoni?"

Raph "I can't believe it. It really is you!"

Pepperoni "•••"

Raph "I swear, I ain't gonna leave you behind this time... Say, who's your friend?"


Mikey "Should we go down there and help those little dudes?"

Renet "No, look! Like, another time portal is opening!"

Page 8


Lord Renet "Savanti Romero! I can see that we're going to like seriously need a new form of punishment for you."

Mikey "Whoa! Who's that?"

Renet "That's me. I'm so much older. I must be like six hundred!"

Mikey "I dig the crazy hat thing."

Renet "Thanks... It appears that I'm the Lord Time-Mistress."

Savanti "I'm impressed. I guess this time my actions have warranted the attention of the older and wiser Lord Renet."

Lord Renet "I won't allow you to use the Utrom technology."

Leo "Renet, in the jungle, it's Bebop and Rocksteady!"

Raph "Hey, guys! Look who I found."

Mikey "Pepperoni!"

Pepperoni "^^^^^ ^^^^^^ ^^^^^ ^^^"

Leo "We gotta do something!"

Renet "Not yet, Leonardo."

Leo "But they'll kill her."

Renet "I know..."

Page 9

Savanti "Destroy her!"

Lord Renet "Like wha—?"


Savanti "Rocksteady, grab her! We must get her Scepter!"

Lord Renet "No!"

Page 10

Lord Renet "Give that back!"


Savanti "Sorry. I win this time. I win!"



Lord Renet "Nnnoouuhh"

Renet "We gotta hurry."

Raph "This is messed up. Is she dead?"

Renet "We've got to follow him into that portal."

Pepperoni "••••! >Anchovy<?"

Page 11

Raph "Well? You coming?"


Savanti "My loyal henchmen, you have served me well."

Savanti "I shall find you in the future."

Lord Renet "The beacon works."

Renet "Yes. It worked..."

Lord Renet "You must get the Scepter back..."

Lord Renet "...And remove the gem."

Renet "Remove... The gem? From where?"

Leo "Renet! The portal is closing!"


Renet "We have to follow him!"

Raph "Come on, little dude. You can do it."

Pepperoni "•^•!"

Anchovy "^^!"

Lord Renet "...Get the Scepter... Remove the gem..."

Page 12

Leo "There he is! Just up ahead."

Savanti "Incredible! You wretched turtles, once again dare try your luck against my vengeance."

Mikey "You got the wrong turtles, compadre."

Donnie "Yeah, we've never met, but first impression? Really not good."

Raph "You're messing with some new turtles now and we're a mean green fighting team."

Leo "Come on, guys! Turtle torpedo!"



Leo "Huh?"

Donnie "He's getting away!"

Page 13

Renet "Oh, no!"

Renet "We're going into an alternate timeline."

Raph "What does that mean, "alternate timeline." "

Renet "It means that someone has altered your history—"

Pepperoni "••!"

Raph "Pepperoni!"

Renet "Oh... This is so not good, guys."

Page 14

[Back in N.Y.C. in the year 2000.]

Mutant Rocksteady "This is great!"

Mutant Rocksteady "It's our old cruiser! I thought I'd never see it looking this good again."

Human Bebop "I just finished reinforcing the suspension and welding this mounting. We're gonna attach a massive gun turret to this baby. It's gonna be like a tank!"

Mutant Bebop "Ha! Yeah, too bad that's not gonna happen. Rocksteady smashes this thing up in a getaway chase not too long from now, I think."

Human Bebop "What? You do?! What's the matter with you?"

Human Rocksteady "Hey. I ain't done nothin'."

Mutant Rocksteady "All right, gang, to the Foot base!"

Mutant Bebop "Sorry, pal, I'm driving."

Mutant Rocksteady "What are you talkin' about? You're in the back seat."

Mutant Bebop "No, I mean young me... I've always been the better driver."

Page 15

Mutant Rocksteady "Well, if I gotta sit back here, I'm taking this thing out."

Human Rocksteady "Hey, I worked really hard on that!"

Mutant Rocksteady "No you didn't. It was easy and you know it."


Mutant Bebop "I don't even know what you're saying. "Corp", that ain't a word right?"

Man "I-I-It's a-a-an abbreviati—"

Mutant Rocksteady "So there's no ninjas here and you've never heard of the Shredder?"

Mutant Rocksteady "It's okay. You can tell us. He's out friend."

Human Rocksteady "I say we turn this creep to swiss cheese."

Man "Ghaaa!"

Mutant Rocksteady "Easy, easy, younger me."

Mutant Rocksteady "Man. I still had a lot to learn back then, huh?"

Mutant Bebop "So this isn't the base of a vast criminal organization?"

Man "N-N-N-No. Like I said, businessmen, lawyers."

Man "No ninjas with, what did you say, razor helmets and k-k-"

Mutant Rocksteady "Kick ass claw gloves."

Mutant Rocksteady "Alright, pal, why should we trust you? Tell me how long you worked here."

Man "Oh, dear God, p-p-please I swear—"

Mutant Rocksteady "How long?"

Man "Three years. I'm telling the truth."

Mutant Rocksteady "He's telling the truth. When the eyes tremble and well up with tears like that, that's how you know they're telling the truth. The eyes never lie."

Mutant Bebop "Well I'm sorry to have bothered you, sir, we'll just be on our way."

Human Rocksteady "It was a nice idea, guys. I guess we'll have to just wait till the Foot Clan becomes a real thing."

Mutant Bebop "Wait a minute! We won't have to wait. This magic wand brought us back from the year 2016 to now. Maybe we can use it to just go back to 2016?"

Mutant Bebop "Yes! Let's do it!"

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Mutant Bebop "Back to 2016!"



Mutant Bebop "Hey look. It's us!"

Mutant Rocksteady "I don't get it. Did we time travel or what?"

Mutant Bebop "Hahaha who cares."


Mutant Bebop "Back to 2016!"

Page 17

Mutant Bebop A & B "Ha hahaha ha!"

Mutant Bebop B "Whoa! Keep your eyes on the road!"

Mutant Bebop A "Hey! Where are they going?"


Mutant Bebop A "They're going down a different tunnel..."

Mutant Bebop A & B "...Guys, I think this is about to get real crazy."

Page 18

[The year 2016. Rio de Janeiro.]

Raph "...Are you saying we've arrived back to when we left from?"

Renet "No. But close. We're actually a week earlier."

Leo "A week earlier? But why?"

Renet "Because we followed Savanti and this is where Savanti went."

Mikey "Um. But Savanti went a different way. We all saw him go off in a different direction, right?"

Renet "He went to a different dimension. He's here and he's here right now, only we can't see him because he's in a different dimension."

Donnie "I think I understand. Savanti went to the timeline he was always going to go to, our timeline. But for us, time has been altered so we can't get back there."

Leo "So someone has altered this reality?"

Leo "Well, I think we know that it's got to be—"

Page 19

Raph "It's them!"


Page 20

Raph "...Gosharoonies."

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