[Opening sequence and theme song.]
[Open on an under-construction high rise in New York City. April is showing the building to the Turtles.]
April O'Neil "This is it, the future home of Channel 6 News. Well, what do you think of it?"
Michelangelo "Totally awesome."
April "The newsroom will be over here, and the broadcasting area will be over there. Oh, and the penthouse floor will be one big revolving restaurant!"
Michelangelo "Radical. You could set it at super-spin and make pizzas."
April "And finally, my office. And this time, it's a corner office."
Raphael "Terrific. But, uh, hanging pictures could be a problem."
April "I'd like to think of it as Burne's birthday present to me. And it's all going to be mine!"
Leonardo "It's her birthday?"
Michelangelo "Uh-oh. We forgot."
[Not looking where she’s going, April backs up and trips over and into a wheelbarrow, which starts rolling.]
April "Aah!"
Leonardo "Oh, no! She's headed for the edge!"
Michelangelo "Chill, dudette! I gotcha!"
[He throws the Turtle Line and hooks the wheelbarrow just as it goes over the edge.]
April "Help!
Oh, whew!"
[Michelangelo pulls the wheelbarrow to safety.]
Oh, whew!"
Donatello "Oh, brother. What luck."
Raphael "Boy, I'll say. It's hard to find a combination "Happy Birthday" and "Get Well Soon" card."
[Cut to the Technodrome at the bottom of the ocean.]
Krang "Shredder, I can't believe you're actually suggesting that. Planning to invade the city with armor-plated bulldozers? I've never heard of a more idiotic idea!"
[They are looking over a miniature replica of the city.]
Shredder "Well, it beats your stupid idea of bungee jumping Foot Soldiers."
Krang "I don't have to take this abuse from the likes of you!"
Shredder "And I don't have to be insulted by an octopus like you!"
Krang "Oh, yeah?"
Shredder "Oh, yeah."
[The Technodrome suddenly tips to one side and then straightens.]
Krang "What was that?"
Shredder "Don't ask me. You're the one with the big brain."
[The Technodrome begins shaking violently.]
Krang "We're being bombarded by intense firepower from the surface."
Shredder "Bebop, Rocksteady, go topside and find out what's happening."
Bebop "But-- But I don't want to go!"
Rocksteady "M-Me, neither! It's wet out there."
[A hatch opens to reveal both mutants wearing diving gear.]
Shredder "Get going, you chicken-livered blister brains. And I want a full damage report. Here, let me give you a hand. Or better yet, a finger."
[He presses the eject button. Bebop and Rocksteady are propelled into the water.]
Rocksteady "Yow!"
[Both mutants are caught in a swirling vortex.]
Bebop "Huh? Hey! What's going on?"
Both "Whoa! Whoa!"
[They are sucked up into a spacecraft hovering over the water. Cut to the Turtle Lair.]
Leonardo "Fellas, we gotta decide on a present for April's birthday. And this program may be just the answer."
[The Turtles and Splinter are seated around the television.]
TV Host "The “Shop Till You Drop Channel” is offering this one-time-only special, a complete set of ninja kitchen knives."
Leonardo "All right! Now, that's something every homemaker could use."
Michelangelo "Forget it, dude. What she needs is this purse-sized portable pizza-maker."
Splinter "When choosing a gift for someone, it is wise to consider their taste, not your own."
Donatello "You know, Master Splinter's right. That's why we should get her this home science kit, complete with test tubes and Bunsen burner."
Raphael "Right. Be the first on your block to blow up your own building."
Leonardo "Okay, Raphael. If you're so smart, what should be buy her?"
Raphael "Simple, Leonardo. This comedy fitness video I rented. “Chuckle Away Your Chubbiness.”"
Other turtles "“Chuckle Away Your Chubbiness?”"
Raphael "Hey, I don't write 'em. I just rent 'em."
[Cut to the Channel 6 news building as Vernon examines blueprints for the new building.]
Vernon Fenwick "I can't believe it! This is outrageous!"
Irma Langenstein "Now, calm down, Vernon. It can't be that bad."
Vernon "Oh, no? April's new office is bigger than mine. It's right here in blue and white."
Irma "Well, what are you griping about? My office is smaller than the broom closet."
Vernon "Oh, it's just not fair. It-- It's just not fair."
Irma "Mm. Speaking of April, don't forget the surprise birthday party we're throwing her this afternoon. I'm on my way to pick up the cake now. You'll be there, won't you, Vernon?"
Vernon "I wouldn't miss it for the world.
And have I got a surprise for her."
[Irma leaves the room and Vernon chuckles.]
And have I got a surprise for her."
[He proceeds to erase April’s name from her designated office space and write in his own name. Cut to the spacecraft.]
Rocksteady "What is this place?"
Bebop "Well, it looks like some kind of spaceship."
Rocksteady "I wonder who it belongs to."
Shreeka "It's mine, disgustingly unkempt creature. You may call me Shreeka."
Rocksteady "[giggles] Did you hear that? Shreeka.
What a scream."
[They both laugh.]
What a scream."
Shreeka "I'll teach you to be insolent with me."
[She lifts her hand and zaps Rocksteady, who flies up into the air, and then lands hard.]
Rocksteady "Whoa!"
Shreeka "And that's just a sample of what I have in store for Krang."
Bebop "Uh, you know Krang?"
Shreeka "Only too well. For eons I've scoured the universe in search of that two-faced double-crosser, and at last I found him. We have an ancient score to settle. Now give me Krang's videocom access code."
Bebop "Uh-uh. No can do, lady. He's got an unlisted number."
Shreeka "Perhaps you gentlemen didn't understand me!"
[She zaps both of them, sending them crashing against the wall. Shreeka floats over to them and hands Bebop a videocom unit. He punches in the number.]
Bebop "Uh, well, in this case, I guess we can make an exception."
Shreeka "Well, Krang, so we finally meet again."
Krang "Galloping galaxies! It can't be."
Shreeka "That's right. It's Shreeka, your former partner in crime."
Krang "Why, my dear, you look wonderful. I haven't seen you in light years."
Shreeka "That's because you abandoned me in the Andromeda Galaxy and made off with my most potent weapon, my Power Pack Energy Ring. And I have come to reclaim it."
Krang "Your energy ring? Well, now, uh, let me think. What did I do with it?"
Shreeka "Think fast, you ganglion gangster! My finger's getting itchy."
Krang "Think fast, think fast. I-I just remembered! I gave the ring to, uh, Miss April O'Neil. She's a television reporter for Channel 6 in the city above us."
[He feeds an image of April into the computer and Shreeka receives it.]
Shreeka "A reporter, you say? Well, she may be the subject of tonight's headline story."
Shredder "Excuse me. About the mutants—"
Shreeka "You mean these vulgar specimens? I intend keeping them as hostages until that ring is back on my finger. Until then, Krang."
[She ends the communication.]
Krang "How dare that woman accuse me, the mighty Krang, ruler of Dimension X, of stealing her dopey ring!"
Shredder "So, you didn't do it?"
Krang "Of course I did. I just don't like her accusing me of it.
It's a beauty, isn't it? Here, try it on for size.
Now aim it and watch what happens."
[He opens the chest plate on his android body and removes a ring case, opening the top to display the ring.]
It's a beauty, isn't it? Here, try it on for size.
[Shredder places it on his finger.]
Now aim it and watch what happens."
[He pulls up images of the Turtles on four different monitors. Shredder blasts each screen in rapid succession.]
Shredder "A weapon that also makes a fashion statement. I like it."
Krang "I'm glad you approve. Now see that it's delivered to April O'Neil ASAP."
Shredder "Krang, this is much too valuable to give away."
Krang "Not anymore. Time has drained it of most of its powers. It's running on fumes. Best of all, when Shreeka tracks down April, the Turtles will rush to her rescue. Then Shreeka and those shellbacks will destroy one another!"
Shredder "Not to mention Rocksteady and Bebop. We'll be rid of them, too! Oh, Krang, you really are brilliant."
Krang "As if there were ever any doubt."