[Opening sequence and theme song.]
[In the lair, Donatello and Leonardo are sparring while Michelangelo works out on a punching dummy. Raphael enters the room decked out in a pirate costume.]
Raphael "Arrgh. Avast, ye lubbers. Keelhaul the mizzenmast."
Michelangelo "Whoa, dudes, it's Long John Turtle. Where's your parrot, compadre?"
Raphael "Harr. What are ye grinnin' at, ye scurvy swabs?"
Donatello "Hey, nice wooden leg, Raphael.
But don't forget to screw it back on the TV table when you're through, huh?"
[He taps it with his bō.]
But don't forget to screw it back on the TV table when you're through, huh?"
Raphael "Oh, man! You guys peeked."
Michelangelo "Whoa. Better not bug him, dudes. He might make us walk the plank into the bathtub!"
Raphael "Very funny. Ha ha ha. I'm dying of laughter."
[He storms out of the room.]
Leonardo "What got into him?"
Splinter "Apparently, you have hurt his feelings."
Michelangelo "I always figured he had a hard shell."
[Raphael is in his room removing the costume. Splinter stops in the doorway.]
Splinter "Raphael? Are you all right?"
Raphael "Oh, sorry, Sensei. I guess I was a little steamed because I blew my assignment."
Splinter "Your assignment?"
Raphael "I'm taking a correspondence course from Pinkerman's Private Peepers to be an undercover detective."
Splinter "Oh! A detective. Why, my student?"
Raphael "So I can make more of a contribution to the mean green team. You know, something special."
Splinter "But each of you is already special."
Raphael "Maybe. But I'll be the only master of disguise."
[He puts on a fake beard/mustache combo.]
Leonardo "Raphael? Uh, we just wanted to apologize."
Donatello "We didn't know you were actually serious about this disguise thing."
Raphael "Well, I am. In fact, I'm going to prove I'm a master of disguise. I challenge you guys to pick me out of a crowd. Say, in the park. In a half hour."
Leonardo "And if we do it?"
Raphael "Then it's free pizzas for everyone."
Michelangelo "Whoa, done deal, dude."
Leonardo "I think you're making a serious mistake, Raphael."
Raphael "Yeah? We'll see about that. In the park."
[He leaves the lair with a suitcase.]