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[The episode starts in a documentary version. April adjusts the camera, focusing on Raphael.]

APRIL: "Okay, we're rolling. So tell me what are the Lair Games?"

RAPH: ["Leader of team, 5 time second place."] "Ah, well it started six years ago when we got swept up in the water bottle challenge."

[Cut to a black screen, with the words "O'Neil Productions Presents"]

MIKEY: ["Youngest brother, ballet master"] "The Lair games are the single greatest day of the year! It's better than Halloween, Thanksgiving, my birthday..."

RAPH: "It's a one day, 16 event, brother versus brother competition."

[Cut to a black screen, with the words "An April O'Neil Production"]

MIKEY: "...uh, me finding a quarter day, finding a quarter day anniversary-"

RAPH: "It challenges you. Both physically and mentally. and this year was the craziest year ever."

[Cut to the title screen for "The Lair Games. A film by April O'Neil"]

[We cut to the center where Splinter announces as a referee. Leo is standing next to him on stage, wearing medals.]

SPLINTER: "As is tradition of the annual Lair Games, The winner of last year’s.."

LEO: [Interrupting] "As five time champ, I’d like you all to stand while I speak."

RAPH: [voiceover, in disgust] "Ugh, Losing to Leo is the worst. You know how they say act like you’ve been there before? Leo never read that book."

LEO: "When I say king, you say Leo. King. [No one responds] Leo. That was great. Okay, but enough about my numerous victories- there are many. This year, in an effort to inspire you to be as great as I am…"

[Leo grumbles in the background.]

LEO: "I’m offering up the biggest prize yet. My room. AKA the best room."

[He shows them where his medals are. Leo had his robe and sunglasses on as he moved the curtain away.]

RAPH: [Voiceover] "It wasn’t about the room, it was about taking something away from him. Something he loved."

MIKEY: ["Loves his brother Leo, but..."] "Man, we were just tired of losing, and no one lost worse than Donnie."

[Flashback to Year 5. Donnie grunts and slams his hand on a watermelon. He yelled in pain and held his hand while jumping. Leo laughs. Year 3: Donnie throws a pizza at one of the targets like a frisbee, only for it to fall on his head. Back to Year 5, Donnie tried slamming his foot at the watermelon only to fall on the ground. Leo laughed harder. Year 1: A younger Donnie curls into a ball while beach balls bounce around him. Meanwhile a younger Mikey was having a good time. Back to Year 5, Donnie turned on his bo staff and formed a rocket hammer and slammed it, but it shot him around the area. Leo laughed even harder and fell to the ground.]

RAPH: "No one wanted to let Leo chump them again this year. We were ready for war."

[The first event is the HandStand hill bomb.]

SPLINTER: "Ladies and gentlemen, reporting to you live from the scene of the first event, the Handstand Hill Bomb!"

[At the top of a slope, the four turtles are doing handstands on skateboards. Shelldon gets closeups at them. When the traffic light turns green, they start rolling down the slope.]

SPLINTER: "And they're off! Ooh, it looks like someone has separated themselves from the pack."

[Leo edges out into the lead, blowing a kiss to the others.]

SPLINTER: "They're coming down the stretch, and... it's... [Leo crosses the finish line] Blue. Ugh, I knew I shouldn't have bet on Red."

LEO: "I may be bald, but call me the hare because I smoke tortoises."

SPLINTER: "In second... [Donnie crosses the finish line, much to Splinter's shock] Purple?"

LEO: "What?"

SPLINTER: "I can't believe it. This is unprec-- wha?"

[Leo pulls the microphone away from Splinter and walks over to Donnie]

LEO: "Second place, huh? What's that feel like?"

DONNIE: "Nardo, please don’t..."

LEO: "Because I only get first." [Drops the microphone on Don's head, much to his annoyance]

[We show Donnie who is happy he managed to win, second place.]

DONNIE: ["AKA Othello von Ryan, BootyShaker 9000"] "Second, baby!"

RAPH: ["Was not dreaming"] " Donnie got second, and I was like, "Am I dreaming?" "

DONNIE: ["Has drawn on eyebrows for 9 years"] "I just got second! I just got second." [mimics a trumpet with his platinum bust]

MIKEY: ["Bless his heart, he always gives it his all"] "It wasn’t a great start for me."

[Mikey crashes short of the finish line, face first, his skateboard rolling past him. The scoreboard adjusts, with Leo out in front, Donnie in second, Raph in third, and Mikey in last.]

[The next event is in the sewer. Splinter is wearing a hazmat suit while the boys stand below a pipe.]

SPLINTER: "And it’s a clear indoor day. Conditions are ideal as we begin event number 2: Pipe Goop Chicken."

LEO: "My signature event. The goop that separates the turtles from the tadpoles."

DONNIE: "Uh, that’s not exactly..."

LEO: "The mice form the rats." [Leo lies down before being followed by Donnie lying down.]

DONNIE: "Yeah, again, you're wrong."

LEO: "Who’s gonna flinch first? Wow, well my money’s on Donnie."

SPLINTER: "Three, two, one!"

[Splinter opens a waste pipe. The pipe begins to shake.]

RAPH: "Pizza supreme in the sky, please give me strength."

[Slowly, a glob of slime begins to form at the end, slowly increasing in size.]

RAPH: "It's too gross! I can't do it!"

MIKEY: "My face is too pretty to be slimed."

[Raph and Mikey bail out, losing the event]

SPLINTER: "Final two."

LEO: "Time to tap out, brother, Time to remember who you are."

DONNIE: "You first, brother."

LEO: "This is your last chance."

[Donnie breathes heavily, though the red eared slider is sweating. The glob grows to a massive size.]

LEO: "NO!'

[Leo bails out.]

SPLINTER: "Blue's out! Purple wins?"

DONNIE: "Yes! I w-ooh" [slime lands on him]

LEO AND RAPH: "Ohh!"

MIKEY: "Oh my gosh!"

RAPH: ["Leader of team, 5 time second place"] "The guy who wears gloves to read his comics got gooped!"

DONNIE: ["Suffered his first victory"] "Literally, the taste of victory was horrible. But figuratively, nom nom nom nom nom."

MIKEY: ["Moonlights as Dr. Delicate Touch, CPA"] "You should have seen the look on his face. It was then I knew we were witnessing history."

[Event 3: Pizza Darts. Donnie's throw hits the bullseye on his target, giving him the win. Leonardo pounds the ground in frustration.]

RAPH: [voiceover] "Donnie won three in a row. He was next level."

[Event 5: Dizzy Race. After spinning around rapidly, the turtles race down a track. Leo reaches the end first and hits a button, getting knocked over by a noisemaker.]

MIKEY: [voiceover] "But Leo? [chuckles] He wasn’t going down without a fight."

[Event 9: Mallow Mouth. Leo and Donnie are on the ground, mouth full of marshmallows. Mikey spits out his. Raph stuffs even more into his massive mouth, winning the event.]

RAPH: ["five time 'Mallow Mouth champion] "I can fit a whole fist in my mouth. Wanna see?"

[The scoreboard continues to increase, Leo and Donnie exchanging the lead.]

MIKEY: [voiceover] "I mean, nothing ever phases Leo, But that day, Donnie was getting to him."

[We cut to Leo in the living room.]

LEO: ["Chief suspect in 'The Incident'"] "So we're agreed, no questions about the incident, right?"

APRIL: "Of course! Please. Leo, tell me about the incident."

[Leo leaves. April appears and looks at the camera, chuckling]

[Event 15: Fridge Balance. Raph and Mikey are already on the floor, while Leo and Donnie are standing, each with a massive amount of objects balanced on their faces.]

DONNIE: "Going into the penultimate event, Fridge Balance. I knew I had it. It was my day, and when it’s your day, you gotta ride it. As the great Bard once said... ["AKA Slayer of Leo's, The Underdog Champion"] To thine own self, beat Leo!"

MIKEY: ["I was like, right there, man"] "And that’s when Leo fell. Or did he?"

APRIL: "So you think he did it on purpose."

[Camera moves as Mikey looks around shiftily, then nods his head.]

SPLINTER: "If Purple wins this event, it will be almost impossible for Blue to catch up. [Leo begins to lose his balance.] Oh no. Blue is starting to wobble."

[Leo falls and crashes. When the wreckage clears, Leo is on top of Donnie.]

SPLINTER: "Purple hit the ground first. Blue wins."

LEO: "Yeah! Whoo!"

[Donnie's ankle is shown under a pineapple, badly swollen.]

DONNIE: ["Victim of Leo's cruel assault"] "It was Leo! He did it on purpose!"

LEO: ["Outrage: Sincere or staged? You decide!"] "I’m only talking to you to set the record straight. I didn't do it on purpose. I mean how could I? I had half a fridge on my chin! This is just like the Salisbury Witch Trials!"

DONNIE: ["Skeptic that 'The Incident' was accidental."] "The Salisbury Witch Trials." [rolls his eyes]

[Back at the scene, Donnie's screaming in pain.]

LEO: "Donnie, you okay?"

DONNIE: "You did this! You’ll do anything to win. My ankle! My moment!"

DONNIE: ["Recalls the traumatic attack by brother"] "I heard it pop. I thought it was all over. Everything I worked for. Everything I dreamed ab- I'm sorry... Can I have a moment?" [covers his face and sobs.]

RAPH: ["Deeply concerned about third favorite bro"] "At that point, it looked like it was over for Donnie. [beat] HA! Did you see his ankle?"

MIKEY: ["Deeply concerned about second favorite bro"] "It was huge! I thought we should amputate."

[Final Event: Shell Bowling]

MIKEY: [Voiceover] "It was over. Leo had it again."

LEO: "Jump!"

[Leo jumps onto the skate halfpipe, tucking into his shell. He zips down, and crashes through a bowling arrangement of mannequins, knocking them all down.]

RAPH: [Voiceover] "New year, same result..."

SPLINTER: "Another perfect ten for Blue, and with Purple unable to bowl--"

DONNIE: "Not so fast, my friend! [emerges from a cloud of smoke] I’m here brother. Let’s bowl."

RAPH: ["Witnessed the underdog's return"] "When Donnie showed up, I was like Whaaaaaa--"

MIKEY: ["WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"] "Aaaaaaaaaaaaa--"

RAPH: ["AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"] "aaaaaaaaaaaaa--"

MIKEY: ["AAAAAAaaaaatt?"] "aaaaaaaaaaaaat?"

APRIL: "I bet you were scared, huh?"

LEO: "Scared? Me? I'm never scared. Is Lou Jitsu scared of, uh, cold soup? No, no, scared?"

SPLINTER: "Donnie needs a ten to win."

[Donnie steps up, dragging his injured leg in a cast. He leaps...]

MIKEY: ["Believes in his purple brother"] "I knew he could do it."

[Donnie attempts to pull himself into his shell, but he can't pull in his injured leg because of the cast.]

MIKEY: ["...Nevermind"] "--is something I would say if I was crazy."

RAPH: ["Also doubts his purple brother"] "With that ankle, rolling east to west? No way."

[Donnie manages to get his leg pulled in, but it throws off his shell spin. He manages to regain enough control to crash through the mannequins. The other turtles start cheering.]

LEO: "No!"

[The mannequins fall to the ground, but one lands upright.]

SPLINTER: "It’s a nine!"

ALL: "What?"

[The scoreboard shows both Leo and Donnie reaching the finish line.]

LEO: "Wait a second... That means.."

DONNIE: "We tied!"

LEO: "Tied?'

RAPH: ["Overwhelmed by unprecedented situation"] "No one knew what to do. I mean, what do we do? Did we consult the bylaws? Did we call the president?"

DONNIE: [flipping through the rulebook] "Section four, article seven. In the instance of a tie the next event will be a...."

[Donnie and Leo stare at each other, worried. They both scream, their eyes wide.]

SPLINTER: ["Oh no... what have you done, Splints?"] [laughs] "I had waited my whole life for this."

LEO: "Splinter’s choice? Are you crazy? Who came up with that?"

[The garage door opens as Splinter slides into the ring, covered in suntan lotion and taking off his robe and wearing sunglasses and a bathing suit. His entire fur shaved off.]

SPLINTER: "Out of retirement... for one night only... It’s Splinter. Time for the Slippery Whippery Woo!"

DONNIE: "Ah, no why?!"

[Mikey flinches, dropping his camera while Raph looks like he's about to vomit.]

SPLINTER: ["World's Worst Father"] "Pretty great name, right?"

[Back to the site of the Slippery Whippery Woo]

SPLINTER: "Sudden death tiebreaker. Purple vs Blue. whoever catches me wins the lair games! Now let’s go."

[Donnie and Leo glare at each other, then charge Splinter.]

LEO: "Got you, old man!"

DONNIE: "No, it is I who has him!"

[Splinter easily slips out of their grasp with his slippery body. The two turtles keep trying to catch the greased up rat, but he keeps dodging or slipping out of their grasp.]

DONNIE: "Hey!"

SPLINTER: "Like this."

DONNIE: "Ow."

LEO: "Oh, not again!"

[Leo crashes into a camera, taking it out.]

DONNIE: "Ahh! Huh! Hey! Ow!"

LEO: "Ah! Ah, oh!"

DONNIE: "Ahh! Out of the way!"

[April barely avoids the sliding Donnie, who bounces off some ring ropes, flying at Spinter.]

DONNIE: "Fibonacci!"

[Leo rushes in from the other side.]

LEO: "Yeah!"

[They both grab onto Splinter, who goes airborne, spinning in their grasp.]

LEO: "We both know how this ends, brother!"

DONNIE: "Not today!"

LEO: "You can’t beat me! I’m the best there is, and best there was, and the best there ever will be!"

[Leo knocks Donatello off, then grabs Splinter for the win.]

LEO: "Huh?"

RAPH: [voiceover] "I started out a Never Leo. But in the end.."

[Leo realizes that all he has in his hands is Splinter's thong.]

MIKEY: "I was actually rooting for Donnie."

DONNIE: "You know what rhymes with second place? Leo’s face!"

[Donnie grabs Splinter and slams him right into Leo's face, taking out the camera in the process. Later, Leo is clearing his things out of what is now Donnie's room.]

DONNIE: "Thanks for the room, bro. You know a champion really needs his space. Champ burn! Burn! Champ burn!"

APRIL: "So, Leo, how does this loss feel?"

LEO: "A better question would be... did I really lose?"

[The camera then focuses on Splinter sleeping in his bed. Leo points the camera at himself and shushes before gesturing to something. Camera moves to Donnie, who covers his ears, his eyes wide, as Splinter's snoring echoes through the vent. Leo turns the camera back to himself and smirks before shutting it down.]

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