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Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids. |
Frogs vs. Punks is the second story in Mutant Nation #5.
Appearing in Frogs vs. Punks[]
Major characters[]
Minor characters[]
Species[]
Locations[]
Objects & vehicles[]
- Axe
- Butterfly knife
- Chain
- Cybertruck
- Flail
- Whip
Synopsis[]
A trio of Purple Dragons stand on the sidewalk outside of a boarded up building with a sign that coming soon that site will be Infinispend Luxury Condos. One of the men says he can’t believe what developers are doing to this neighborhood. One of them, Chun, says what he can’t believe is that they’re security guards. Malo says that Infinispend is there to cash in on Mutant Town. He guesses the freaks fixed it up enough that the real humans can finally start taking it back. Malo indicates a “notice of demolition” sign posted on the building. Link comments on Infinispend’s good human values.
The gang doesn’t realize that they are being spied upon by a trio of Punk Frogs carrying paint cans. Genghis tells his pals that he knows they came just to deface yuppie bait, but… He doesn’t need to finish the thought because Attila and Napoleon know what he means. They leap, paint cans in hand. Just as Malo asks if his buddies heard something, the Frogs slam into them. Genghis sprays the back of Malo’s shirt and says that this is disgraceful, even for them. Attila sprays blue paint across Link’s eyes and Napoleon hits Chun’s hoodie with yellow paint, saying that working for landlords must mean they not only hate mutants, they hate all humankind.
Drawing a butterfly knife, Malo chases the Purple Dragons into the building. Link tries to hit Napoleon with a chain, but the mutant frog blocks the chain with his whip. Chun, fists up, faces off with Attila who asks if he doesn’t have a weapon. Chun insists he needs nothing but his fists, which are registered weapons, but then suddenly he turns and runs. Using his axe, Genghis knocks the knife out of Malo’s hand and tells him this is why you don’t bring a knife to an axe fight.
Link swings his chain at Napoleon, taking out a couple of wooden posts while he’s at it. He says Casey Jones isn’t around to bail him out this time. Napoleon replies that he needn’t bug him over those three dweebs and delivers a kick to the face. The Frogs surround Malo and Link. Genghis calls them mutant-hating dorks and says it’s time to wrap this up. Attila says not quite because they’re missing the extra-annoying one.
As if on cue, Chun bursts through the wall with a forklift. The Frogs leap aside and Chun rams the forklift into a load-bearing column. Malo calls Chun a fool and asks who taught him to drive. Chun answers nobody as they’re New Yorkers. A sudden loud rumble draws the attention of the Frogs. The ceiling and posts begin to crumble and the Frogs decide it’s time to leave. They crash through the nearest window and the Purple Dragons beat a hasty retreat right behind them. Chun wants to know if they’re still getting paid tonight.
Just as everyone clears the building, it collapses. As dust fills the air, a Cybertruck pulls up and the driver shouts about their investment property, saying that they’re ruined. The second occupant of the vehicle steps out, lifts his hands and grins widely, saying that this just saved them a million on demolition. Not to mention, he adds, that they’re eligible for a massive insurance payout. He gives the Purple Dragons a 10/10 for a review and says he’d hire them again. The driver asks about the mutant freaks but the other man asks if he’s kidding. As far as Fenton Q. Hackenbrush’s bank account is concerned, those Frog Punks are heroes. Nearby, the Punk Frogs are highly dismayed. Napoleon says he’s gonna be sick and Attila whines that their precious street cred is gone.