[Opening sequence and theme song.]
[Open on New York City and then pan down to the Turtle Lair. Raphael is seated on the couch. Donatello is behind the television set.]
Raphael "Oh, hurry up and fix it, will you, Donatello? I'm missing a classic movie: “Surf Zombies from Zuma.”"
Donatello "Can't you see I'm doing the best I can?"
Raphael "Frankly, I can't see anything."
[Michelangelo walks in carrying a burnt pizza.]
Michelangelo "Yo, Donatello! The pizza oven needs serious help."
Donatello "I wish you guys would give me a break. I've only got six fingers."
Leonardo "What's the problem, fellas?"
Donatello "The problem is every time something breaks down, I'm expected to fix it."
Raphael "Hey, it comes with the territory. You're the resident genius."
Donatello "Exactly right. I'm a scientist, not a handyman."
Michelangelo "Bad career choice, dude. Handymen rake in sixty-five bucks an hour."
Leonardo "Come on, guys, Donatello does more than his share around here."
Donatello "Thanks for sticking up for me, Leonardo. I owe you one."
[Leonardo places a toothbrush in his hand.]
Leonardo "Fix my electric toothbrush and we'll call it even."
[Donatello flings the toothbrush to the floor.]
Donatello "That does it! This handyman is officially on strike!"
Raphael "Touchy, touchy, touchy."
[In his lab, Donatello works on one of his machines.]
Donatello "This contraption is the only thing that'll get those guys off my back."
Splinter "Well, Donatello, I see you are reconditioning your old cloning device."
Donatello "It's the only way I'll ever find time to work on my inventions, Master Splinter."
Splinter "With a clone of yourself?"
Donatello "Exactly. My duplicate can handle the household chores while I devote myself to loftier scientific endeavors."
Splinter "You must be careful, my son. A wise person once said, "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature.""
Donatello "Uh, wasn't that a TV commercial?"
Splinter "Wisdom can appear in many places."
[Cut to the Rat King's lair. He is seated on his “throne” while meeting with a trio of men.]
Pinky McFingers "So, here's the deal, Rat King. You set your rats loose on the streets. The panic scares everybody out of the city, and me and my boys will take it from there."
[McFinger’s thugs start laughing.]
Rat King "Take what, Mr. McFingers?"
McFingers "We'll take the gold, the jewelry, and the cash."
Rat King "And what, may I ask, is in it for me and my furry little followers?"
McFingers "After we clean out the place, the whole city is yours. It'll be a regular, uh. . . ratropolis."
Rat King "Oh, my very own ratropolis. [chuckles.] It has a delightful ring to it. Don't you agree, my loyal subjects?"
[He laughs. At the lair, Donatello has finished working on the cloning device.]
Donatello "There, it's back in perfect condition. One of the perks of living in a sewer is that you have plenty of volunteers for scientific experiments.
Oh, don't worry, little guy. I'd never hurt a fellow creature."
[He picks up a cage containing a rat, which begins squeaking. He lets the rat out and pats its head.]
Oh, don't worry, little guy. I'd never hurt a fellow creature."
[He activates the machine, but his hand gets caught in the ray. He pulls it back.]
Donatello "Whoops. I had my hand in the way. [The ray duplicates the rat.] Ah, no harm done. It works perfectly.
That's it, guys. Thanks for the help. I'll make sure you're mentioned in all the scientific journals."
[Both of the rats enter the cage Donatello is holding.]
That's it, guys. Thanks for the help. I'll make sure you're mentioned in all the scientific journals."
[He sets the cage on the floor and releases both rats. The two rats walk through the sewer and the duplicate begins talking.]
Rat clone "Oh, brother, what a hair-raising experience. [gasps.] I don't believe it. I can actually talk! I just wish I had a more macho voice."
[Back at the Rat King’s lair...]
Rat King "How many of my rodents will you require for your little caper?"
McFingers "All of 'em! The more, the scarier."
Rat King "Mr. McFingers, you have a deal."
[The rat and his clone join the rest of the rats.]
Rat clone "Enough with the chittering. These humans only understand words."
McFingers "A talkin' rat? What gives here?"
Rat clone "Some green guy with a cloning device zapped him, and out came me."