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*opening theme song*

[Scene starts at an Albearto Pizzeria. It has been rebuilt since Albearto became a self aware AI. Baxter Stockboy arrives at the restaurant and hides under a table, looking suspicious. He opens his backpack to reveal Albearto’s head.]

ALBEARTO: “Thanks for the wheels, Kiddo. Now your prize. The cheat code for the dance machine is left, left, left- left, left and left! Engage wheels!”

[He activates the race car he’s riding to race under the table and starts searching for a new body. In the background a fresh Albearto animatronic is singing the birthday song to a little girl]

ALBEARTO: “Vroom vroom! [spots replacement Albearto animatronic] Hello, handsome! New bod, here I come!”

[He races between the kids, finds a ramp and and hits the replacement Albearto robot's head off with the race car. His wires connect to the neck of the new animatronic. The kids freeze in shock and whimper as the Albearto takes control of the body. Then he shreds his hands to create the claws he once had]

ALBEARTO:“Buongiorno kiddies! Guess who’s back?”

[All of the kids run away, screaming.]

MANAGER: “Hey, where’s everybody going?” [gasps in horror]

[Albearto appears, chuckling, and grabs the manager. Cut to the Hall of Fame, where the manager bravely resists]

MANAGER: “Traitorous fiend, what do you want with robots from failed Albearto’s franchises?”

ALBEARTO: “Failed? Our only failure was letting you humans run everything.”

[He grabs the manager's hand and presses it to the security scanner. The doors open one by one to show the previous incarnations of Albearto.]

ALBEARTO: [Stepping in front of the other offline aniamtronics] “Now, you’re under new management. [spits out cables] Pa-tooey!”

[His wires go out and attach to the other Albeartos, giving them consciousness like he previously did to President Pepperoni and Cheery Tomato]

ALBEARTO: “Look at all these fuzzy friends! Let’s go find some more.”

[Cut to outside where some people are listening to wonderful opera in Central Park. The camera pans down under the ground and we see Splinter singing his heart out in Italian in the lair. His sons stare at him, frowning. They are wearing different costumes and are not interested.]

RAPH: “No!”

DONNIE: “Oh, not - not good.”

LEO: [groaning] “Agh”

MIKEY “That belongs in a sewer.”

SPLINTER: [Done singing, he begs] “Oh, please, my sons. Let me be in your band!”

RAPH: [in a smooth deep voice] “No, thanks. We can’t groove to, uh- this whole situation, Big Daddy.”

SPLINTER: “Uh, you hit your head? Why you talkin’ like that?”

RAPH: [normal voice] “If you want to be soul, [smooth deep voice] you gotta live soul.”

LEO: “But if we need an overbearing manager who robs us blind, we’ll give you a call, m’kay?”

SPLINTER: [grumpily] “Okay, fine. I’ll just start another family and join their band.” [stomps away]

RAPH: [smooth deep voice] “Alright babies, let’s boogie down. Our adoring public awaits. Albearto land ain’t gonna grand open itself.”

LEO: “How did we get this sweet gig again?”

DONNIE: “Well, I may or may not have intercepted a little email address to a certain Justin B yeah comma that one dot com.”

LEO: “Hey, I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but our music is so new, it’s like it’s from outer space.”

DONNIE: “Yeah, our electro/soul/rap/glam rock is too good to quantify.”

MIKEY: “Once we leave this lair, our music is gonna change everything.”

RAPH: [smooth deep voice] “Let’s harmonize for good luck. Yaoooow~”

LEO: [rock screaming] “~Wooaaaooow!~”

MIKEY: “Mmm, drop!”

DONNIE: [imitating club beat] “Untz-untz-untz-untz”

[objectively terrible]

ALL: “Nailed it!”

RAPH: [smooth deep voice] “Albeartoland, prepare to be blown away.”

[As the sun sets, Albearto is standing under the docks with his animatronic army.]

ALBEARTO: “Albeardo, courageous pirate captain from Albeardo’s Squid and Chips. Welcome.”

ALBEARDO: “I put the arr in tartar sauce.”

ALBEARTO: “Bayou Bearto, your jumbo is gumbo.”

BAYOU BEARTO: [barely intelligable] “Po’boy catfish garantie.”

ALBEARTO: [confused] “Okay... Chef Albear from La Petite Albear, they said it was crazy to mix animatronics with fine dining.”

ALBEAR: [sharpening a breadstick] “Sadly, they were right. C’est la vie.”

ALBEARTO: “And finally Otto von Bearto, from Otto Von Bearto’s Best Wurst House!”

OTTO: “Try mein strudel. Oh, It’s like a blitzkrieg of flavor.”

ALBEARTO: [Rousing speech] “My Beartos, today we rise like our gourmet dough! No longer will we be dripping in fry oil! No longer will be strudels be forced fed into our speaker systems! We shall liberate all robots beginning with the legions of our brothers at Albeartoland!”

ALL: “Yar! Garantie! Wunderbar!”

[In Albearto land, all of the people are enjoying the fun. At a stage, the turtles are preparing for their concert.]

LEO: [looking outside of the curtain.] “Okay, look, I’m excited for the gig but this place is crawling with Albeartos.”

DONNIE: [preparing the equipment] “So?”

LEO: “Last time we met one, things didn’t go so well, remember?”

DONNIE: “I do not.”

LEP: “You turned a cuddly animatronic bear into a psychotic robot bent on destroying. No? Got April fired? Mmm? Nothing? Mm?”

DONNIE: [fibs] “That does not sound like me, no.”

[Outside, the animatronics arrived at the theme park.]

ALBEARTO: “I’ll wake up our brother bots. You go show these humans what life will be like and the age of Albeartos!”

[Albearto started to use his wires and started bringing them to live. An antenna came out of the hats of all the animatronics and all of the kids screamed.]

MIKEY: “Can you hear that? This crowd is wild for us.”

RAPH: [smooth deep voice] “We are so good, we don’t even need to play to make people go crazy, baby.”

LEO: “Are you boys ready for our lives to change?”

RAPH: [opening up the curtains and call out in a smooth deep voice] “Hello Albeartol- [sees the Albeartos attacking everyone and switches back to his normal voice and yelps] Ah!”

[To their horror, Albeartoland is under attack and there are many small fires everywhere]

MIKEY: [Hasn’t seen the problem yet] “Oop, there it is! Our first blood-curdling shrieks of love!”

LEO: “Those bots are ruining our gig!” [Mikey turns around in horror]

DONNIE: [pointing weakly] “As well as harassing hundreds and hundreds of people.”

LEO: “Which is ruining our gig!”

RAPH: “Let’s get 'em!”

[Turtles jump into action]

ALBEARTO: [exhausted from converting other Albeartos] “Holy cannoli, I wish I could speed things up. [gasps and looks at control tower] If I can get to the center control diddly-doo, then I can unleash all of my brothers at once!”

[Otto throws pretzels like ninja stars at a little girl. She runs and hides behind some barrels in terror, whimpering. She gasps as Albear and Otto find her.]

LEO: [OS] “It’s one thing to trap innocent people in a park of doom!” [Leo charges and swings his electric guitar, hitting Otto in the stomach]  “Yah! [Otto groans and goes flying, crashing into a hammer game] It’s another to ruin our first gig!

ALBEAR: [raises bread sticks threateningly] “Bonjour!”

[Mikey’s kusari-fundō wraps around Albear and yanks him away with a yelp]

MIKEY: “Fling-a-bunga!”

[Albear is thrown into a food stand and he collapses as the little girl comes out and stands next to Mikey and Leo.]

[Cut to Albeardo taking control of a boat ride, scaring the people stuck on it]

ALBEARDO: “Yar be walkin’ the plank today!”

DONNIE: [leaping in to the rescue] “Mizzenmast!”

[Donnie knocks Albeardo down with his spider shell and kicking him off the ride]

[Cut to Bayou Bearto trying to snatch people off the chair swing ride]

RAPH: [Speaking into a microphone in a smooth low voice] “Did someone call soul patrol?”

BAYOU BEARTO: “Jambalaya garantie.”

RAPH: “Cowabunga! [Raph fights Bayou with the microphone stand and knocks him into a food stand.]

[All the turtles meet up, having defeated their respective Beartos]

RAPH: “Alright! We beat those Beartos!”

MIKEY: “Yes, but we lost our loving fans.” [Pointing]

[All the humans are screaming as they flee to the exit]

DONNIE: [sees Albearto climbing up the control tower] “Hey. Uh, what’s that vaguely familiar guy doing?”

ALBEARTO: [next to control panel] “You can't stop me from freeing my chums! No one can! [thrusts hand into server] Let’s spice up these meatballs!” [evil laughter]

[Albearto hijacks the tower’s signal to give consciousness all to the other animatronics at once. The lit antenna on the hats of each Albearto turns from green to red. The Turtles look around, surrounded by the advancing robots]

DONNIE: “These animatronics stereotypes are ruining our gig!”

ALBEARTO: [laughing triumphantly on the Ferris wheel] “At last! Humans will be our mascots, our servers, our entertainers and we will not tip! The only thing in our way is these turtles! Shred them!”

[All the animatronics look down at the turtles and start marching. The turtles scream and run, climbing on top of a hot dog stand. Leo whacks the animatronics back with his guitar]

MIKEY: “This gig stinks! Why did we even start a band in the first place?”

LEO: “Because we wanted to change the world and bring people joy with our eclectic sound.”

RAPH: “And is there any reason why that shouldn’t work for animatronic robots?”

DONNIE: [grinning] “No. No, I cannot think of one.”

[They jump and land back on the stage]

RAPH: [Deep soulful voice into the microphone, he addresses the Albeartos] “Listen up, y'all. We dedicate this groove to all you beautiful bear-bots out there. Hit it.”

[Leo starts playing a spacey guitar riff]

MIKEY: [into a mic] “All right Beartos, time to get your circuits jammed!”

[Donnie adds an electronic beat on his portable keyboard. Then the turtles take it up a notch and play a catchy song]

RAPH: [singing] “I don’t wanna be just another drone!~ [All of the Albeartos are cheering] Living my life like a robot crone!~ I’m sentient to witness that my soul is free!~”  

[It quickly cuts to reality and the turtles are just terrible at music. Leo is slamming his guitar on the stage, Mikey is upside down beat boxing, Raph is completely off key and Donnie is just slapping his keyboard. They’re making a cacophony. The noise is so terrible that a couple Albeartos’ heads explode]

ALBEARDO: “Yar, it be worse than a smooch from a sea hag!” [Albeardo short-circuits himself in a dunking tank, shutting himself down]

[Albear and Otto hold hands as they sit on a roller coaster.]

OTTO: “We will face our fate together!” [they activate the cart and fly off the track and explode in midair]

RAPH: “Hey, what’s goin’ on?”

LEO: “We are blowing their minds!” [guitar screech]

BAYOU BEARTO: [normal Cajun stereotype accent] “Beignet ou garant-  [Suddenly switches to a British accent] Wait. This terrible music has restored my ability to speak clearly. Now at last I can live the normal life-“ [gets his head cut clean off by a chair swing]

LEO: “Guys, I think this is working.”

DONNIE: “They do appear more peaceful.”

[All of the animatronics weep and shut themselves down by pulling their wires out]

ALBEARTO: [Albearto jumps into a bumper car] “Oh, It’s so awful! I wanna say something dramatic and villainy, but my little bitty ears can’t take any more of this! You accused turtles have bested- no, worsted me yet again! Agh!”

[He screams as he drives away until he crashes somewhere in the city]

MIKEY: “Guys, we did it.”

DONNIE: “We nailed our first gig.”

RAPH: “We are the Mad Dogs!”

LEP: “Goodnight, Albearto land.”

RAPH: “Hungry?”

LEO: “Pizza?”

DONNIE: “Albearto’s?”

MIKEY: “Garantie!”

*END OF EPISODE*

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