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 YOU'RE NOT ON 
 NICKTOONS 
 ANYMORE! 

Some TMNT stuff really isn't for little kids.

Characters[]

Major characters[]

Synopsis[]

In the sewers beneath 49th Street, the Turtles are having trouble navigating. Suddenly, Raph hears Metallica's "Master of Puppets" echoing from somewhere in the sewers and follows it. The Turtles stumble upon a massive gang meeting full of thugs with an axe to grind. The grungy leader expositions that some big time boss has been organizing all the gangs in the Projects into a single, unified force. They’ve been invited to a “meeting” over at the Wasteland where they’ll be issued an ultimatum by the unified gang: “Join us or be destroyed”. The grungy leader isn’t having this and proclaims that they’ll show up to the meeting, but they’ll be ready for war.

The Turtles split, hoping to stop this gang war before it begins. The Turtles head to the Projects and after asking the right questions to the right people, they find the (upscale) building housing the big time boss behind the gang unification. While his brothers wait on the roof, Leo drops into the penthouse to visit the boss.

The boss isn’t especially surprised to see Leo, as he has several connections within the Foot Clan. Leo explains that he represents a third party that doesn’t wish to see the unified gang from the projects invade other territories. The boss offers a contest: four on four, if his gang wins then Leo must steer clear of his operation from now on, but if Leo wins then he will remain within the projects. Leo agrees to the terms and promises to meet him in the wasteland tomorrow night.

The next night, at the Wasteland, all the gangs have shown up, ready to fight. The boss of the unified Projects gang summons his four ninja while the grungy leader of the separatist gang is prepared to throw down full force. Suddenly, Leo and the Turtles emerge and Leo offers to fight on behalf of the separatist gang. The grungy leader disagrees until Leo subdues him and forces him to concede. Leo then introduces his “gang” as “the 49th Street Stompers”.

With that out of the way, the boss of the unified gang issues the weapons of the match (padded staffs) and announces the rules (whoever is knocked off their feet is disqualified, last man standing wins, no deathblows allowed). The Turtles then face off against the quartet of ninja. Very quickly, three of the ninja and three of the Turtles are knocked down, leaving only Leo to fight against a lone female ninja in a silly full-body purple latex getup. Leo outmatches her, breaking her staff in two. Enraged, the ninja attempts to stab him with the pointed end of her broken staff. Leo effortlessly flips her onto her rear, winning the match.

The match over, the boss of the unified gang admits defeat and promises to restrict his operation to the Projects... for now. He muses that perhaps they’ll meet again someday as the Turtles split the scene.

See also[]

Trivia[]

Although this story promises a plot extension, it was not picked up over the course of the Mirage continuity for unexplained reasons.

Reprinted in[]

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